Until Eternity BxB

chapter 28

I wish that more people would be straight forward in their intentions and what they mean. I usually do not have this issue . However it is becoming more and more frequent. After leaving Alviva's house I had went straight home. After a few moments of moping with my face down on the bed I decided to take a look of the pictures that I had taken of the place. In my defence I mainly took pictures of the ones on the wall therefore it is not creepy , most of the pictures contained myself and another person.

In some of the pictures I was arguing with someone, in some I was crying with someone . It was very rare that I was smiling and laughing with someone . They were right when they said I have never gotten so close to anyone before, besides my family whom I have nearly completely forgotten. As I slid my finger across the scene over and over again names came to my mind "Martin", "Morien", "Michael", "Malcolm", "Mark". I eventually dropped my phone on the bed and closed my eyes . I was lost in a spiral of memories , I felt like I was drowning.

Martin was my first relationship after the curse. He was honestly the worst out of them all as well .I was new to everything. I knew that I wasn't usually attracted to big and arrogant men such as Martin but something about him pulled me in. He basically left me flat on my face in love with him too...Literally he hit me and I landed on my face , he wasn't into men ,which was completely understandable . I just wish I knew how to keep a hold of my emotions better .

Morien...was tricky, after my first failed relationship after the curse I was a lot more reluctant to talk to people whom I found attractive. Turns out so was he. He had selective mutism. That wouldn't have been an issue in modern times but I couldn't read lips or know sign language , We had very little means of communication. At this point I was just sulking in the consequences of the curse at that point, I had given up all hope that I would ever be free and that I would fall in love with someone who would love me back .

Michael nearly worked out, except His parents did not approve of us, or of his sexual orientation. When I say against I mean full on, crazed about their son being tainted by the work of the devil against his sexual orientation. I was basically kicked out of their village by an angry mob who thought that I was cursed by evil. Which isn't completely incorrect . Except this devil had a red dress instead of a red tail.

It was at this point I was trying to forget, I was trying to forget the fact that emotions existed all together. I drank too much, I partied too hard, I was feeling less and less human as the days went on. I had forgotten all emotion, not just love and loss but I forgot about sympathy and warmth and happiness. I laughed in the face of danger and death. I would say that was my lowest point. I tried to do anything to give me a rush of danger as I convinced myself that I was invincible. I was inhuman and I had lost all separation from other mortals because I was not one of them anymore.

The one person that brought me back down to earth however was Malcolm, other then Maddox he was the closest that I had gotten to breaking the curse. Malcolm was unfortunately paralyzed when he was rather young and therefore he had to be pushed in a wheelchair. That didn't stop him from having the brightest smile that I had ever seen. Malcolm was a happy and care-free soul which I envied at the time. He had made it his life's mission to make me smile , he succeeded in that. We were dating for around about three months before he had gotten into another accident and sadly passed away. I know you are probably asking "Why didn't you notice the colour change on your curse mark thing then?" well I was wearing gloves nearly all the time at that point. I was relatively ashamed of it and it gave me a sense of dread every time I looked at it.

Malcolm made me realize that I might have a chance of breaking this curse, he revived the hope that I had once lost. I had a whole new outlook on life . At this point Alviva only showed up when I had given up on a relationship. She laughed and gloated that none of this pain would have happened if I had just agreed to go out with her. But I didn't receive a visit from her after my relationship with Malcolm. Now that I think about it, perhaps she held an empathetic link with me and that's how she knew Maddox was hurt. I didn't want to dwell on that too much though, I would like to think my emotions were a private thing.

Mark was another piece of work, he wasn't the nicest person but well...he was my last love and the wounds weren't fresh but they weren't as...healed as the other ones are. He was rather similar to Martin if I am completely honest, there was something that drew me to him but he didn't feel the same way towards men, he had a girlfriend at the time who took quite a fancy to me. It was rather bloody awkward all the time considering we were all in the same classes and had to work together often.

I wasn't nearly as distraught at the end of that crush as I was with Martin's though, I was realizing that times had changed and that he simply did not like my gender, which was alright. Now that I have Maddox I am very reluctant to et him go. I am also very reluctant to continue the relationship now that I know that his life could possibly be in danger.

I pulled my phone back in front of my face and scrolled along, deleting the memories . Eventually I came to the photo I took of the drawings. I sent the picture to Alaric and I waited for a reply .

any idea who this is? (and please tell me this isn't alviva's drawing skills ?) -C

it took alaric a good moment to answer but when he did he wrote

oh my god! Chester that is golden and brilliant blackmail thank you for sending it to me . I remember drawing that with Amity when Alviva was out. I don't know who it is but I think that I could find out for you. glad to hear you're doing well after your chat with Alviva.- A