Inevitable - sidnaaz Journey post BB

Inevitable Part 18

The phone connected and none of them spoke at once..

She looked at his face. He looked tired and exhausted, his eyes drained and his hairs messy as if he has been running his hands through them continuously. crying

She was a mess too he noticed. Her eyes though dry now looked like could tear up any moment.. she was not meeting his eyes as if she feared if she looked at them she won't be able to take the disappointment in them..

She has been thinking about all this whole night.. somewhere back of her mind she knows she is probably overreacting... especially after whatever Sid has told and showed her in last one week before she came here.. had it been before that, her reaction might be justified, but not after all that happened between them last week. She should trust him now.. Though her mind is saying this all, her heart says something else.. especially now when she is not near him her insecurities are rearing up again..

She has seen him flirt numerous times. She knows he is good at it. And she has seen what effect that has on girls too. She knows that flirt is nothing but just a fun talk for him and he won't go further than that.. Especially after Sana has told him she does not like it.. But her poor heart is not ready to let her believe it fully.. she keeps thinking what if he finds someone better than I? What he finds someone more mature.. what if he gets tired of handling my tantrums... what if he is tired of my childish behavior... what if... and the list is long in her mind.. her lips quiver thinking of all that again.. eyes ready to pour all over again.. and she does not want him to see her like this again and that's the reason she has been avoiding him from last few hours.. After the initial burst of anger passed when she heard the news, she knew she should talk to Sidharth and tell him she trusts him.. but all these thoughts in her mind were making her insecure and she did not want him to know it. She knew it will hurt him knowing she doesn't trust him after all that he has done for her in past few days..

He sees the change on her face... he knows she is about to break down again and he doesn't know what to do or say anymore.. If she were here he would have held her close and everything would be alright.. but now he just felt helpless.. He saw she was about to say something, but he wanted to apologies to her before she says anything at all..

"I am sorry.. " they both said at the same time...

Surprise mirrored on both of their faces.. not knowing what the other person is saying sorry for..

"Tu kyun sorry bol rahi hai..? tu to gussa hai mujh pe.."

She shook her head saying no..

He looked at her confused.. "to fir? Tu baat kyu nahi kar rahi thi raat se..?"

She just looked down not able to answer his question..

"Meri taraf dekh baby.. kya hua bataa.. kyun fir baat nahi kar rahi kal se agar gussa nahi hai to? "

"pehle thi ab ni hun.. " she said in a low voice still looking down not able to meet his eyes..

That made him even more confused, but he felt little relieved that she was at least speaking to him now..

"ab nahi hai ?? to fir meri taraf dekh ke baat kar.. "

He waited for her to look up .."Sana???"

She met his eyes finally looking up, her eyes welling up as soon as she saw the doubts in his eyes ..

She wanted to trust him.. she wanted him to be able to work with anyone he wanted to without worrying about her .. she wanted her to not be insecure.. but it wasn't what hear heart was letting her do.. and she was not good at lying.. he would read everything in her eyes without her saying anything...