They Never Said It Would Be Easy

August 23, 2018

"Girls! Come in here! I need your help!" I scream from my room. Casey and Morgan come running in, expecting me to be in some sort of danger. There eyes are wide and panicked as they search my room for the problem. "Can you guys sit on my suitcase so I can zip it shut? I think I overpacked?" They both let out a sigh of relief and help me fit my entire closet into a small suitcase. 

Today we are leaving for Cabo for a few days. Our friend group has had this planned for a while now and it is finally here! We are staying at an all inclusive resort right on the water. But that isn't even the best part. Natalie and Aria are going to be joining us! I haven't seen them for well over a year now so I insisted that they come along. I want them to meet my new friends and I have been dying to meet their boyfriends. Aria is still with Dan, they guy who helped Casey on that scary night in a frat house in Colorado, and Natalie is with someone that I have never met, but from what I have heard they are perfect for each other. I haven't mentioned anything about Brooks to them. I didn't want to explain our current situation because honestly, I am not exactly sure what is going on myself. We hang out a lot and we have both laid our feelings out on the table, but nothing is official yet. I don't want to share details about our "relationship" or whatever it is just in case it doesn't last. I am hoping that Cabo will bring me the clarity I need. 

Morgan, Eli, Casey, Connor, Brooks, and I arrive at the airport together and meet up with James, Eva, Aria, Dan, Natalie, and her boyfriend Matt. We make our way through security and onto our plane. The seats are all random, but I am relieved to see that I am sitting with Natalie and Aria. I would have been happy to sit with any of my friends, but I need to get them up to speed with what is going on in my life. 

Aria cuts right to the chase. "Okay so I did the math and this is obviously a couples trip, making Brooks your date?"

"We have been hanging out a lot recently. It's nothing serious yet, but I do have feelings for him. I know that he likes me, but I have no idea what is going to happen between us."

"He is so different from Colin, in a good way. Don't get me wrong, I loved Colin way back when you two were together, but this change could be good for you. I'm really happy for you, Gigi," Natalie says and Aria nods signaling her agreement. 

I needed this. I needed someone from the outside to share their perspective on whatever it is I have going on with Brooks. Besides Casey, Natalie and Aria know me better than anyone, so I am  thrilled to hear that they see what I see in Brooks. They see a sweet, caring guy that has an interest in me. I really hope that they never see his dark side though. I hope that that side remains in the past, forever. 

Our plane lands and we all squeeze into a shuttle that takes us to our hotel. Between the 12 of us, we got three two-bedroom suites. Natalie, Matt, Aria, and Dan grab the first key card and head up to get settled in. James, Eva, Casey, and Connor grab the next one, leaving Morgan, Eli, Brooks, and I to share the last room. We find the elevator and go up to our room. 

The room is incredible. One large living area with a kitchen plus two bedrooms, both with a balcony and view of the resort pool and the beach. Eli and Morgan go into one room, leaving the other room for Brooks and I, or so I thought.

"You can have the room, Gigi. I can sleep on the pull-out couch," Brooks says as he starts to make his bed.

My heart sinks. I thought that we would be sharing a bed, but I guess Brooks didn't share the same idea. "Okay," is the only word that I can get out. I don't want him to see the disappointment that is so clear on my face. I guess I am getting our relationship clarity much earlier that I thought. 

The whole group meets up and we go to dinner. As we arrive at our table, I make a point to not sit next to Brooks. He made it clear by choosing the couch that he is not as invested as I am and quite frankly, I am embarrassed. I decide to sit on the end of the table with Natalie and Aria so that I can get to know Dan and Matt. I hope that Morgan doesn't mention anything out loud about Brooks sleeping on the couch. As soon as dinner ends I am going to talk to her about it. I don't want the whole group to know that Brooks doesn't like me and that he would rather sleep on a couch than in a bed with me. 

We finish dinner and we all decide to get some sleep. We had an evening flight, so it is already pretty late and I am exhausted. Once we get to the room, Eli hops in the shower, leaving me the chance to talk to Morgan alone in her room.

"What is the deal with Brooks sleeping on the couch?" Morgan asks, clearly annoyed with Brooks's flip flopping.

"I have no idea. I thought things were going so well with us. He planned the most romantic dinner date and we have been talking almost every day since. I thought he liked me." I can't even meet Morgan's gaze. I am embarrassed. This is the first guy I have liked since Colin and it just took a complete 180 degree turn from amazing to nonexistent. I should have known better. Brooks could never truly care for me. 

"I am going to figure out what is going on. Just be patient and try to have fun. We are in Cabo, remember? Let's make the best of it!"

Morgan is right. Once Eli gets out of the shower, I go in. I need to wash away all of my worries and remember that I am on a trip in paradise with all of my best friends. I cannot and will not let some guy ruin a trip that I have been looking forward to for so long. After I shower, I put on my pajamas and go to sleep for the night. Tomorrow is our first full day in Cabo and I am going to make sure it goes off without a hitch.