Legolas explaining life to Aragorn inside his head
I also didn't write most of this, it's from a 500% amazing-fabulous-thranduik-hashtag filled-all caps text conversation with the one and only Meluiel aka Thranduil's #1 Admirer
fml not the smelly dwarfffff
ugh my braids are getting tangledddd
Aragorn help me braid them again
pleeeeeaaaseee
I'll braid your hair
Pleeeaaaseeee
Free horseback rides!
Come to think of it, 'save a horse, ride Aragorn'
"save" a horse meaning I secretly have the hots for you like Gandalf does Galadriel
have the "hots" for you meaning I want to kidnap you and bring you back to Mirkwood with me
Aragorn stop struggling my ada already approves of you plus this black bag over your head isn't that bad okay
Ada pleeeease pleeeeaaaseeee say you still approve of Aragorn
DONT PULL A TAURIEL ON ME ADA PLEASE I SWEAR ARAGORN IS DIFFERENT HE WONT LEAVE ME FOR A DWARF
hey Aragorn wanna go raid a dwarf kingdom.
why? oh for no reason also so that my ada knows your not a dwarf lover
my ada doesn't like it when I bring lovers home who like dwarves his elk gets angry
what do you mean 'what elk'.
it's this elk my ada likes to keep with him it's his spirit animal
what do you mean 'what elk?'
what do you mean 'it DIED'?
anyway Aragorn do you mind if Gimli and I go on adventures in Fangorn
nothing will happen I (don't) promise
I tooooootally don't fancy Gimli that dwarf that shared a thousand horses with me
I'm not Tauriel.
I'm not a creepy dwarf fancier.
Noooooo Aragorn don't leave we've just started the feast of starlight where my friends get drunk and I eye squint
you should see ada at the parties
but Aragorn it's fuuuunnnn
he likes to drink elvish wine and go in hot tubs like a lot
as long as certain-elleth-captains-of-the-guard-named-Tauriel don't walk in on him and get all official and formal
it's funny
yeah anyway if that happens just do what Bilbo did and just walk away. okay Aragorn? walk away.
you have to trust me on this
oh and if random laketown men show up don't panic them and my ada kinda get along as long as my ada gets this giant shiny jewel some midget died for
like a nin eru these midgets are dropping like flies over this shiny thi-
oooooooh shiiiiiinnnnyyyyy
maybe someone (an orc) used a dwarfswatter to get rid of them
ya that makes sense maybe the dwarfxterminator smaug couldn't eve get rid of them
long story short, Aragorn, my love, botfa was a watered down version of a pest extermination gone wrong
leggy out.
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wait
I can't get out
we're inside my head
#fabulous exit awkwardly ruined
YOU ARE READING
Fandom Incidents
De TodoWARNING: Rated H for Hilarious. Parents, watch your children, they are strongly cautioned, as reading this may cause serious injury by hyperventilation, heart attack, death by feels, and in serious cases: extreme fangirl attack. [sindarintrash's bo...
