SAVE ME

Ch#21 Time to Show Mine

Ch#21 Time to Show Mine

The day continued as usual after Yohan and Bethany opened up about their past. But Ellis seemed weird. He looked as if he was in some kind of trance. Why do I feel like he wants to speak something but he isn't ready for it? His heart looks heavy and his eyes clearly express that. If I would try to speak to him, he would only push me away. I knew better, so I just ignored him.

It was time for dinner and everyone started to file out one by one. My eyes landed on Ellis. He was sitting in a corner of the room, facing towards the wall. His back looked miserable. I wanted to walk towards him. But what if he doesn't let me in again?

"Alana, come fast. What are you waiting for?", Yohan called out. I hesitated to go with them for dinner. I don't know what came into me, I just didn't want to leave Ellis alone.

"You guys go ahead. I'll come soon. Don't wait for me and dig onto your food, okay?"

"Alright. Be there soon", Bethany replied and they left. I waited till every student vacated the room. I then walked towards Ellis and sat beside him. He gave me a glance and continued to stare into the empty wall.

"Hey", I greeted him. As I expected, he ignored.

At least he didn't get up and leave. That's some progress there, Al.

"The cracks are beautiful." I tried to strike a conversation.He sighed at my effort and asked, "Why are you here?"

"Just to ask if you aren't hungry. It's dinner time and you did not even have lunch."

"Just leave."

"Alright. My stomach is grumbling and it needs food to calm down." I sighed and stood up. I'm the stupid one for even thinking that he might let me in.

Just as I turned around to leave, he grabbed my wrist. "Al, wait." I was startled when he called me Al. Nobody except Aiden calls me so. It's not that I mind people calling me Al though. It just feels weird. But why does it feel good? Like weirdly good. You know what I'm saying?

"You could at least pretend to care."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Why should I pretend when I actually care for you?"

He was surprised by my reply. He slightly pulled me towards him, motioning for me to sit down. He let go of my wrist as I sat beside him. I gave him his time to speak.

"Thank you."

Okay, I did not expect that from him.

"Did you just thank me?", I blurted out in surprise.

He nodded and replied back. "Yeah. I just thanked you. You not only helped the others to break away from their fear, but also protected me from Dave. To tell that I wasn't scared would be a lie. I mean, he had beaten the daylights out of you. If he can do that to a girl, then what wouldn't he do to me? I did fear for my life."

Subconsciously, a smile crawled up my lips. He finally accepts me as one of the members of the Base.

"I mean, who wouldn't, right? It's not that I am a coward. No, I really am not a coward. I was just-"

"Okay, now you're just ranting, Ellis", I stopped him before he could go on and on without a stop.

"I know you're not a coward. Anybody at that moment would have been scared to death after seeing what Dave had done to me. If you were a coward, you would have taken your own life long back and wouldn't have been sitting in here giving hope to the others." I smiled at him while he returned back the smile.

"You have a beautiful smile. You need to smile more often." He rolled his eyes and shook his head while I continued to observe the emotions held in his eyes. He wasn't relieved. His eyes held sorrow. I furrowed my brows trying to interpret his emotions. He looked into my eyes and suddenly we had this staring contest. Before any of us blinked, he tore his eyes away from mine with guilt.

Why does he feel guilty?

"I'm sorry, Al." I thought my eyeballs would pop out of my socket. I couldn't believe my ears!

"Woah. Never knew you had such a word existing in your dictionary." Shocked would be an understatement. I am flabbergastingly mind blown with this revelation of his words!

Okay, now you're just being dramatic.

Oh, am I? Then let me tone it down. I was utterly at loss of words with his apology. That was the last thing I ever expected from him. But why is he apologizing to me?

"For what?", I asked him and he shot me a confused look. "Don't get me wrong. I do have a long list of why you should be sorry to me, but for what reason exactly are you apologizing right now?"

He looked away from me in humiliation and replied, "For calling you a prostitute and for not trusting you when all you were doing was just helping us." I was about to open my mouth with a sarcastic reply when my other half stopped me.

He is opening up, Al. Do not stop him. Let him let out his feelings.

At times like these, it's better for me to listen to my other half. I gave him a look to continue.

"To be honest, I still don't trust you. But I know that you aren't one of Dave's people."

Instead of getting angry at him for still not trusting me, I replied to him with a smile. "At least you know that I am one of you guys. That's enough for me for now." He furrowed his eyebrows and asked in exasperation, "That! How do you do that?"

This time I furrowed my brows and questioned him back, "Do what?"

"Smile. How can you smile all the time leaving behind all the pain and struggles and the reality of our situation?" I did not know how to answer that question because I never knew I do that.

He sighed at my silence. "You must have never had any struggles in your life. It must have always been rainbows and cupcakes for you. Maybe that is why you are able to smile no matter what the situation is."

I don't know what came over me, but I decided to show him my scars, my past, my pain. If I want him to trust me, I need him to know me. Everyone here has their own pain behind their smile, it's time to show him mine.