parallel ; {p.jaehyung}

twenty-two ;

on the way home in the car, it was fairly silent. everyone was tired after a long day of walking around and that resulted in a quiet car. brian was laying on my shoulder, his breaths a comfort to me. i leaned against the window. i tried to sleep earlier, but my head wouldn't stop spinning, so i stayed up to count the cars passing us on the road. 

jae was in the front and i couldn't tell if he was awake or not. day6's newest song was playing softly on the radio.

we finally arrived home and i gently shook a sleepy brian awake. 

after helping jae get brian into bed, i hurriedly left the room. thankfully, jae didn't make any move to call me back. 

when i closed the door to my room behind me, i let go of a breath i didn't realize i was holding. i sank into the covers of my bed with my eyes closed. the events of tonight washed over me with a heavy weight. i slammed a pillow against my face and sighed. 

without changing into more comfortable clothes, i soon fell asleep.

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the next morning, i ran into sungjin in the kitchen eating a bowl of fruit and watching a video on his phone. "they cancelled activities for today. i think jyp thinks we've done a lot last week," he said, handing me an apple.

i thank him for the apple and go back into my room. a day to myself? what could i even do?

in the end, i called em and asked if she was free to hang out. hanging out with a girl seems like the best thing to do, considering jae was occupying most of my thoughts these last couple of days. 

em and i met at her workplace and it was already 1pm when her shift ended. she smiled when she saw me, greeting me with a tight hug. "it's been so long," she said.

"yeah, i'm sorry i've been so busy." i carried her bag as she put away her uniform. 

"don't even apologize. i understand. besides," she said with a wide smile, "you deciding to hang out with me on your surprise day off is already the sweetest thing you can do for me." at that, a small smile appeared on my face.

the two of us decided to go to the outlet just to window shop and gossip. i've had a lot of my mind these past few days and i was itching to vent to someone i trusted. 

emily stared as i burst on and on about the last couple of weeks. i couldn't even believe the speed the words were coming out of mouth. i told her about the "drama" between us (she said she noticed some tension on the live stage), brian and i making up, then my conflicting feelings about the two of them. 

after my long-winded rant, she paused for a moment, rifled through the hung up clothes in the store we currently were in, then turned to look at me. "i think you did the right thing, not jumping into a relationship with brian. but wow, feelings for both of them? that's intense. and on top of that, you seem to not be going anywhere with them."

i felt heat rise to my cheeks. "yeah," i said, suddenly feigning interest in the bright neon crop top hanging to the left of me. "no where at all." the memory in the ferris wheel late last night flashed through my mind, but i pushed it down. there was no way to explain that to her in a day.

"anyway," i said, speeding up my pace through the store, "as an idol now, i have bigger things to worry about, don't i, emi?" 

"yes, of course, but before that, you've had a thing for jae since like ever. so i would consider this a pretty big thing," she reminded me.

"whatever, he doesn't need to know that," i said. 

emi decided she was hungry, so we went to the nearest convenient store for cheap, to-go meals. while emi ate her instant noodles, i was mindlessly chewing on the bibimbap, thinking about what had taken place the night before.