Comeback Felecity

Chapter 27 - Introduce

Nang naramdaman kong umalis na siya ay saka ko nagpasyang maligo. I'm all mess.

Naramdaman ko ang sakit mula sa sugat ng kamay ko nang pumatak ang tubig mula sa shower.

Sabay ng paglabas ng tubig ay ang pagtulo ng mga luha ko.

Kailan pa ba ito mauubos ,umupo ako sa malamig na tiles at niyakap  ang mga tuhod ko.

Kailan pa ako naging mahina.

I'm fucking emotionally,mentally and physically strong nung umuwi ako pero heto ako ngayon parang batang inagawan ng laruan.

How dare love turns me like this?

Ngayon lang  nag sink in sakin lahat. Ako nga ba ang mali? Obviously ,no other than.

Nemesis Chayden Dickinson.
I wanna pause my mind from thinking, I wanna stop my heart from beating. I want to be okay, I wanna have peace on my own.

I am prepared. I'm fucking planned all this but it's still hurt.

I'm afraid of losing people but I'm not scared if they lose me. I don’t care about what they feel all I know is my feelings. I'm so selfish.

When I got my Diploma and pursue my dream profession.

I'm so proud of myself. When I close many deals regarding business, I feel that I don’t need anyone to make me happy because I can do it on my own.

I can wipe my own tears and win my silent battles but when it comes to love I become weak.

Its past 8 but I don’t feel hungry, all I feel right now is being guilty on what I did. Humiga ako kahit hindi ko pa masyadong napapatuyo ang buhok,wala na akong panahon para doon.

I want to think on how can I resolve this fucking mess.

My mind wants to say goodbye and forget all the things that happened today and fly back to Los Angeles but my heart wants to fight again, beg for forgiveness and take all the possible consequences .

I open the sliding door para makapunta sa veranda ng kwarto ko.

Nanuot ang lamig ng hangin sa aking balat . I'm wearing a shorts and sando , stupid of me.

Tanaw ko mula rito ang mga ilaw na mula sa mga kabahayang malapit dito sa hotel.

Maybe I'm preoccupied of all the things that I wanted to escape so I forgot the world. I never realize how wonderful  it is despite of all the pain.

I'm too focus on becoming a successful business woman that I missed all the amazing experience.

I never make  a new  friend on that 12 years, I learn to drink but on my own, I didn’t attend the concert of my Favorite band and artist , I never attend a friend birthday party, Road trips, Adventures, sunsets and sunrise.

I'm too busy that I forgot a normal life.

Wala akong inisip magdamag kundi ang mga bagay na nawala sa akin. Mga bagay na hindi ko nagawa At ang mga taong iniwan ko bigla.

Maybe I'm blinded by my nonsense jealousy to the point that I forgot what is the definition of being happy.

Nagising ako kinabukasan dahil sa katok ng pinto mula sa labas.

It's probably Skye.inayos ko muna ang sarili ko bago lumabas. As I open the door, I'm disappointed with what I saw.

“ Ma'am , pinapahatid po ni Sir Skye. Kumain na daw po kayo” I never imagine this. I don’t want to eat inside my room coz the smell will probably stay but I have no choice but to accept it.