Yowzah Oneshot Collection (2)

34(G)

Left a clouded mind and a heavy heart

      mygalfriday (BrinneyFriday)

She spots it in the middle of a dig on San Helios. Doing some field research for a paper and having hands on experience ahead of her class isn’t exactly cheating but it’s close enough to it that for a moment, she thinks he has arrived to scold her. It would be so like him, dropping out the sky to wag a finger at her and disappear again without so much as a hello River thanks again for overcoming a lifetime of programming to save my life and by the way, you look lovely today how about a nice snog to make up for the last one where you passed out right when it was getting good? But the TARDIS doors don’t open and the blue box continues to sit there in the distance, hazy on the desert horizon, like the best kind of mirage.

Frowning, River tugs her gloves from her fingers and stands, wiping at the sand-encrusted knees of her trousers and squinting against the sunlight. Maybe he’s waiting for her to come to him, to show her that she has a choice in all this. As if she ever really wanted a choice other than the one that was given to her.

Abandoning her team with the excuse of needing the loo, River makes her way toward the TARDIS with a skip in her step. It’ll be the first time she’s seen the Doctor since Berlin and subsequently, her parents as well. University is nice – she certainly enjoys the studying more than she ever had as Mels – but she can’t bring herself to form close bonds with anyone there. She feels so set apart from them, so different. She’s quicker and cleverer and she doesn’t even need to try to get good grades or dates, she can close her eyes and feel the delicate threads holding the universe together, so entwined around her it feels like she could reach out and touch them. It’s difficult to look people in the eye when she can see every choice they never made.

The only people who have ever put her at ease were Amy and Rory. To them, she isn’t an anomaly, or a weapon or somebody’s future lover. She is their friend, their daughter, a Melody and not a River. With them, there is no pressure to be anything greater and River marches across the dry, cracked earth beneath her boots with thoughts of the familiarity of Amy and Rory – of home – waiting inside to greet her.  

Pressing her hand to the TARDIS door, she slides her fingers over ancient blue wood and feels the box hum beneath her touch. She feels a distinct motherly aura overwhelm her, as if the ship is welcoming her back and maybe telling her to eat something because she looks far too thin. Breaking into a smile, River whispers, “Hello, Old Girl,” and pushes the door open with a creak, stepping inside.

Instantly, she notices that things are…different.

The interior of the TARDIS has changed completely – gone are the warm lights and the glass floors. Everything is a little darker, from the light to the furnishings, like the TARDIS herself is in a state of…grieving. It’s all very steampunk but River can still feel the reassuring hum of the Old Girl beneath all the changes, a reminder that Her essence is the same as ever.

For a moment, she thinks the control room is empty but as she shuts the door and takes a cautious step further into the room, she realizes there is someone lurking behind the time rotor – her eyes widen – someone in a voluminous skirt.

“Hello?”

A head with dark curls piled on top pops out from behind the time rotor with a squeak. “Oh. Hello.”