Bet My Heart [Book 2]

34| Scared

*Nick's POV*

I hated myself for shutting down on Demi, but I couldn't help it. My mind was spinning like I was on some dysfunctional Disneyland ride. I felt scared and helpless. Like I fucked up and had zero way of fixing it. I had no clue what to do. What could I do?

I read that text on the boat, and my whole world stopped.

Demi hounded me for days, weeks even and I couldn't bring myself to tell her.

Would I lose her? Will she hate me? She left when it was even a possibility, what is she going to do if she knew it was true?

I told Demi about getting a puppy but the second she asked me why, It was like that little detail in my life that use to fill my thoughts was barely noticeable anymore. 

I was currently at my moms, which I also felt bad about since I had lied to Demi. The first few days, I did work on our almost finished album, but then I flew out to my parents house because I needed help. I finally had caved and knocked on their door with the most painful headache making my head throb.

My mom opened the door, hugging me before taking my coat. "What brings you home Nick?" She wondered, handing me a water bottle. 

"I need your help mom" 

I watched her face turn into intrigue and concern, leaning against the counter. 

"Okay?"

I knew I needed to just spit it out. I couldn't hold this secret anymore. It had been two weeks with this scary truth just bubbling in my core with immense guilt and taking over my thoughts. I quickly spat it out and waited for the percussion. "Priyanka's pregnant" I spoke almost too fast to make out. 

Dead silence. 

My words echoed throughout the home, and my mother's mouth stayed shut.

"What?" She spoke in disbelief

"She's pregnant with my baby mom" I sighed, my face going in my hands. I felt so disappointed in myself. Like I had ruined everything good that I had finally built up. I was almost 28, and I have a baby coming with a woman I didn't love. I felt like a horrible person. I felt mad at her for telling me even though I would be mad if she didn't tell me. I felt mad at myself for getting in this situation and most definitely ruining my current situation with Demi, I felt the most mad at myself because Demi had finally told me she loved me and I was about to crash and burn her whole world and sadly I resented my unborn child for even being a thought in my head. I couldn't help but wonder how I let this happen or how I could feel this way. I felt horrible for feeling the things I felt and for wanting to act on the horrendous thoughts in my head. 

"When did you find out?" She finally spoke. 

"A while ago. I was waiting to find out if it was mine or not. I met up with her last week, and she showed me the results. The babies mine mom. I'm going to be a dad!" I exclaimed in frustration and slight anger. 

"How far along is she?"

"I don't know for sure" I sighed, my head continuing to spin the more I thought about it. 

"How don't you know?"

"I'm not with her every second mom. Everything has been so crazy that the weeks are just blending together. Hell, I just celebrated my girlfriends birthday! She told me she loved me.. fuck! Mom she finally told me she loved me and now this fucking comes up! She's ruining my fucking life!"

"Nicholas! Quit swearing!" Mom scolded, myself rolling my eyes. 

"How long have you and.." She paused.