Games on Blazing Flames (Flames Series #1)

Chapter 28

Piece

Kung hindi kaya ako sumugal mangyayari kaya iyon? Paulit-ulit kong tinatanong ang sarili ko pero iisa lang palagi ang sagot ko, hindi. Hindi mangyayari lahat ng iyon kung hindi ako sumugal. Pero kahit paulit-ulit na hindi ang sagot ko alam ko sa sarili kong susugal at susugal parin ako.

I won't experience true happiness if I didn't take a risk. Akala ko noon... ang kasiyahan ay mararanasan ko lamang sa loob bar, sa pagpaparty, sa pag-iinom, at sa pagmomodelo ko, but I was wrong all along dahil ang kasiyahang pinaranas ng mga iyon sa akin ay hindi tunay na kasiyahan. After a very long time, I experienced how happiness truly feels and that was when I met Sage. Kahit ayaw ko, kahit pinigilan ko, sa huli siya parin ang naging kasiyahan ko.

It was scary at first pero hindi ako nagsisi. Hindi ako nagsisi pagkatapos ng lahat... pagkatapos ng lahat ng pinagdaanan ko... namin. Hindi ako nagsisisi kahit pa sobrang sakit. My only regret was when I let the past ruined everything... even my happiness. Kung sanang hindi ko hinayaan ang nakaraan na apektuhan ako. Kung sanang hindi ko hinayaang magwagi ang galit ko... baka walang buhay ang nawala, pero tapos na... hindi na pwedeng ibalik ang nakaraan.

They say everything happens for a reason. I don't know how many times I've heard that before. Paulit-ulit at nakakainis but until now... I can't still agree with it because as a woman who was supposed to be a mother, there is no enough reason to lose a child. Hindi ko makita ang rason na iyon. Bakit? Why do I need to lose her? Para saan? Until now... until now, I can't still find the answer.

"This is your fourth time in Beauteous Fashion Show, right?" I nodded and glanced at my hairstylist who is currently curling my hair. "So what are you feeling right now? I mean are you... nervous or not since this is your fourth time?"

I pursed my lips and smiled. "To be honest... I'm still feeling nervous." I chuckled. "I'm nervous that I might slip or what... I can't embarrass myself in front of thousands of people." She chuckled and nodded. "I'd rather kill myself before I let that happen," dugtong ko.

"Oh, ghad! I might do that, too!" Pareho kaming natawa sa sagot niya. "Okay back to the topic, your country is the Philippines, right?" I nodded. "I heard so many good things about your country! What a great country and the people there! I heard about their hospitality."

"Yeah, I'm proud that I came from a great country with great people. They had given me so much support ever since my first walk in Beauteous."

"Done," bulong ng hairstylist ko. Nagpasalamat ako sa kaniya bago niya ko iwan kasama ang reporter. Binalik ko ang tingin ko sa camera. Nakita ko sa tabi ng cameraman si Tito Abel, pinapanood ako.

"How lucky... so how are you these past three years of being a supermodel? By the way, congratulations on being the newest Gucci ambassador! You're now one of the highest-paid models!" My mouth parted when one of her staff handed me a bouquet of purple tulips. Bumaba ang tingin ko doon at pinigilan ang paglaho ng ngiti. My grip on the bouquet tightened when memories of him bombarded my mind. Bakit sa dami ng bulaklak ito pa?

"T-they're pretty! I love tulips, thank you so much!" Pinasaya ko ang boses ko kahit na ramdam ko ang pagsikip ng dibdib ko.

"I'm glad you like it! So... back to the question, how are you these past three years? You've been living the kind of life that every model wanted to have, I'm sure you're happy!"

Pinilit kong panatilihin ang ngiti ko. This is my job, ang ngumiti kahit minsan hindi ko na alam kung totoo bang masaya ako.

"The past three years of my life here in New York weren't really all rainbows..." Sandaling bumaling ang tingin ko kay Tito Abel na nginitian lang ako at tinanguan. It only means that I can continue what I'm about to say.