Out of the Slump~Shadamy

Put Yourself First

Amys Pov

Shadow held me straight as he brought me outside. My legs are clamming and it's hard to walk. I could feel the eyes of everyone in the room on me. I don't think I've ever been this embarrassed in my whole life.

Why would he say that? Why would Sonic say all of that to me? I know he doesn't think of me the way that I think of him. I know that I was foolish to ever fall in love with him the way that I did. But I never thought he would say that stuff in front of so many people.

I didn't even realize that we were outside yet until Shadow called to me,

"Rose, are you ok?" His voice is the softest I have ever heard it. Even softer than when he spent that time in the hospital with me. It makes me feel a sense of comfort even though my whole body is shaking.

I can't bring myself to answer him. Anything I could say would just sound like complete bullshit anyway. What do you say in a situation like this? 'Oh, I'm fine, my crush just publicly embarrassed me in front of all of my friends, and not only that but every one of his words were true.'

They were true. Well, most of them. There was one thing Sonic said that I just couldn't get out of my head.

I look towards Shadow. His crimson eyes gazing down at me full of worry. He does look like Sonic. More than I may want to admit. But, I've never looked at Shadow and saw Sonic. Maybe that one time that I confused them but that was years ago and I didn't even know Shadow back then. They look alike but barely. Their personas are completely different. They don't have similar mannerisms or even ways of speaking. Yet, I still chose to be around him compared to everyone else.

"Rose, talk to me." The worry in his eyes only grew now.

"I'm sorry," I mumble quietly, averting my gaze from the black hedgehog.

"What? What could you possibly be sorry for? You didn't do anything." His brows furrow and he scowls at me.

"I should have never came to this party. Let alone invite you to it. You don't even like this kind of stuff."

His scowl deepens if that's even possible. His eyes flicker from worried to cold in a matter of seconds and I can feel it as the chill rushes through my spine.

"You know...I'm really tired of you taking the blame for everyone else's crap. Do you not know how to feel for yourself, Amy? Do you not care enough about yourself to open your eyes? You're just as important as everyone else." He points to the door behind us, "No one in that room is more important than you are. So stop putting them all on a goddamn pedestal!" His voice rises and the rage returns. The same rage that he unleashed on Sonic earlier.

"Shadow I-" He cuts me off.

"What? You're sorry? Sorry for what Amy? Sorry for being hurt? Why can't you hurt the same way everyone else does? What makes you think that your feelings matter any less than the rest of them?" He stops, breathless. His face is twisted in a myriad of emotions. His eyes show worry. His features show rage, but all the words coming out of his mouth are raw emotion.

"I really wish that you would open your eyes and start seeing yourself as a real person. So what, You had a crush, big deal. We all have crushes. Most people have to experience unrequited love at some point in their lives, but that doesn't give the other person the right to do what he did. The fact that you would apologize for the actions of someone like that is the saddest part." He starts to calm down a bit.

"You're allowed to be sad Amy. You're allowed to be unhappy, and after tonight you are more than allowed to be angry. Just stop holding it in. You're not hurting anyone but yourself."