Sanditon Season 2: The River and the Man

Chapter 159

Walking stiffly down the lane Sidney led Charlotte nervously as he tried to walk amiably and without purpose but a simple stroll was not what he had in mind.

"So, are your family well?" he asked nervously echoing another momentous walk they had once on the cliffs.

Frowning confused by his line of questioning she nodded. "My brothers and sisters are much grown over the winter," she answered.

He listened this time more expectantly. Eager to know more about the people he wished to please.

"And your mother, and father?" he asked. "They are in good health?"

Charlotte smiled thinking this conversation all too familiar. "Yes, Perfect...or I wouldn't be here now," she answered.

Sidney winced feeling foolish as they meandered down the building lined road littered with tables and pallets for the construction.

Turning as they approached the building on the corner he turned. "And it is strange," he said seriously as he struggled to find the words. "that you are here, that is." the attempt at explanation seemed unessential.

Charlotte shook her head as she shrugged. "Georgiana came to see me. Her and Otis met my family." she started. "And I returned with them just last night."

Smiling he thought of his former ward and the fact she never sent word of return or warning that Charlotte would be with them. "I see. She did say she was going your direction," he commented in thought and looked up at the building he faced.

Noticing his change in posture Charlotte turned to see.

"It is almost finished." she looked at the corner apartment which housed more windows than the middle ones.

Sidney gestured her inside. "Would you like to see?" he gestured. When he noted her hesitation he just walked ahead. "Come, I wish to speak with you inside."

As she entered the doorway she found a central Foyer. The walls were bare, but she could see the sample rolls of paper on a table and she went to it and traced her fingers over the squares. Her fingers brushing up against the rolls of options. Blue, pink, gold...

Sidney took her hand in his and pulled her from the rough work table to the stairway where the natural light streamed in from stained glass he had commissioned in all of his houses.

Sidney's eyes were dark and sad reminding Charlotte of the time in the parlor when he had told her of his engagement with Eliza. Her heart hammered in her chest, her face frozen bracing herself for utter ruin, again.

"I was better prepared last time," he muttered nervously thinking of his rehearsed lines to her the evening after the regatta, and their ill-fated ball last summer. She never knew how much he had worked to contrive a well-worded proposal only for it to never be said. His eyes drank in her large and afraid ones and he tried to summon the courage to say what needed to be said.

Charlotte swallowed. "Just say it." She said as she started to blink back tears again wishing to pull her hands back and recoil from pain.

He looked around. "Charlotte, this apartment, house... It was the one I wished to take to escape the drudgery of a bad marriage." he smiled softly thinking that he had indeed escaped Eliza whenever possible.

With a deep shaking breath, he started to explain. "But then I went back to the drawing board this week and expanded it at the great irritation of my architect," he said without mirth and a dark tone implying that there was argument but as the boss on site, he would have his way.

"I walked these halls and imagined a happy life." Continuing, his throat tightened and he looked down ashamed of his emotion. "Charlotte, I imagined you here, filling not just my every waking thought and nightly dream but really here, with me. Not out of reach," he said his eyes boring into hers.