us against the world : shirbert one shots

when will it fade

one shot: anne died early of an awful disease, as a result, gilbert is not okay. 

(no caps intended)

"bash?! sebastian!" jem knocked softly on the front of the old house, praying bash could help.

bash came running from downstairs and swung the door open, his smile immediately dropped when he saw the pure anguish on jem's face.

"boy, what is it?" he asked softly.

jem sighed deeply "i really need your help. i don't know what else to do."

bash ran his fingers through his hair worriedly, "how is he?".

jem shook his head slowly, rubbing a hand over his face. "he's not good. he hasn't eaten in eight days, hasn't slept a wink since it happened either. he doesn't even speak, he just sits there, staring... like he can't function. bash its really scary."

"she was his everything... i don't think he knows how to live without her. his world was just ripped from his hands, i know how he feels." bash breathed in deeply and pinched the end of his nose, deep in thought.

"bash i- ..." jem wasn't sure if he should continue,

"go ahead" he reassured gently

"the doctor, he said that— that it's possible to... die of a broken heart... he said it's rare, but does happen." salty tears dripped down his pink cheeks "i can't loose them both. i just can't."

bash held him tight, wondering if gilbert would actually leave him too.

.

when the two men arrived at the blythe house hold they were met with an eerie silence. the brightness of all the colors were now dull. the rooms that were once filled with laughter and singing and endless rambles were now bleak and quiet. the house that had felt like home to more people then it actually inhabited now felt like home to no one.

they walked into gilbert's room and found him sitting on the bed staring at the wall.

"blythe?" bash spoke carefully "how are ya?"

"i don't know what to do." gilbert broke down. he shook his head while tears welled up in his big hazel eyes. "she promised she wouldn't leave." his breath became ragged as large tears glided down his cheeks. "what am i supposed to do? just move on?" he shook his head again, contradicting himself,
"i'm not moving on."

bash sat beside him and held his shoulder tightly. "you're going to be okay. i swear it." he whispered, choking up himself.

"i miss her so much." gilbert's vision became blurry, "i miss her so so much" his head swirled and body became dizzy.

"dad! dad, calm down, take a deep breath. please." jem moved gilbert to sit by the window to get fresh air.

gilbert admired the bright flowers that had started to bloom on the windowsill and caressed them softly, "she loved spring. stupid stupid spring. why does everything look so happy?! she's not here. she's not going to come home and ramble to me. she's not going to kiss me goodnight. i don't get to hear about her day," his tears came down faster "i don't get to hear her sing. i'll never get to re-braid her hair after it gets messed up in an adventure again. i'll never see her up early dancing with the flowers." his lip trembled "i'll never get to tell her i love her again."  gilbert put his head in his hands. "i miss her so much" his whole body shook as he sobbed.

jem looked over at bash with tears in his eyes. bash gave him a meaningful look as tears dropped down his own face.

"i know. i know." bash hugged him tight. "blythe, we all miss her, but right now you need to eat and get some sleep. please."

gilbert shook his head violently "no. i can't! everytime i close my eyes i see that beautiful red hair and stupid taunting smirk, and rosey lips, and quirked dimples, and all i want to do is run to her and hold her as tight as i can, and never let go. i relive that last minute over and over every time i close my eyes and i just can't. i can't do it." his breath quickened and his hands began shaking. "it's going to kill me."

bash didn't know what to do. he knew anne and gilbert had a once in a lifetime connection but this was more. this was actual heartbreak. anne had taken a part of his soul with her and there was no way to know if it would ever return. would gilbert ever be okay again?

bash looked over at jem, who looked panicked. jem had just lost his mother, and now his father was going crazy with grief. bash wished he could solve everything.

gilbert began to tug at his hair harshly and jem gave bash a look of concern.

"dad, listen to me okay?" gilbert nodded "okay, we need you. the kids need you, i need you. mom wouldn't have wanted you to stop living just because you can't live by her side. you'll always carry her with you, so take her on adventures, sing the littles to sleep for her, live your life for her." jem spoke quietly.

gilbert gave a weak smile and nodded. jem hugged him tightly. "i'm sorry i haven't been there for you jem."

"it's okay dad. it's okay."

just then, bash saw five little heads pop out of the door frame. they all looked worried and scared, but walked in anyway.

"daddy?" rilla held her blankey close, stepping towards the bed.

gilbert looked up and gave her a little smile, "hi darling." she climbed onto his lap and snuggled into him, that's what she had seen her mom do whenever he was sad.

walter stepped up next, "it's gonna be okay."
he came from behind gilbert and wrapped his stubby arms around his neck, burying his head in his back.

nan and di walked on the bed and hugged him sweetly. "daddy, we are going to be alright." "it's okay."

shirley walked up last and laid his head in gilbert's lap. "can you tell us a story about mommy? i miss her." he asked innocently.

gilbert smiled through tears, "of course. i miss her too little one..."

he thought for a second before lighting up with a smile.

"did i ever tell you how she refused my first proposal??"

"what?!"

"no!!"

"no way!!"

gilbert smiled, "yeah she did! basically, what happened was...."

maybe gilbert would never feel the same fullness again, but his life would never lack adventure and love. he made a pact to go on as many adventures as he could, and to always keep her close while he did, so someday, when they met again, they would laugh and reminisce on the fun they had.

a/n been feeling extra angsty lately... oops?

this is not my favorite but here ya go anyway <3