In The Dark

The one they love.

I will never matter like she does to you. 

I don't know what else I can do. 

I try to be better than her. 

But I know its her you prefer. 

I'm pushed to the side when she is involved. 

I don't have much more resolve. 

I have to push myself not to give up. 

I'm still young but my life sucks. 

The events play on a loop in my head. 

Right now, I really wish I was dead. 

I have nightmares and wake up crying. 

Everyone will say I'm lying. 

But they would never say that to her. 

I'm the one who's a blur. 

They look past me to the one they love. 

I'm the one they dispose of. 

They leave me in the dust to run to the one they want. 

The one that gives them something to flaunt. 

They want the one who only gives them trouble. 

I will always only be her double. 

I am not my own person when she is around. 

Nor when she left us in the background. 

I am not loved like she is. 

Don't say Its not that serious. 

She left us all high and dry. 

She didn't care how many tears we cried. 

She left me to pick up the pieces of our family.

While she left us so angrily. 

No one could help me when they were all broken. 

So all my words and feelings were left unspoken. 

Glass pieces of my heart still remain on the floor. 

But millions of pieces got broken into more. 

I'm left broken and lonely. 

No one around to hold me. 

No one cares enough to ask. 

So I keep silent and I break at last. 

But holding it in for so long. 

I became so very numb. 

I was only the glue holding everyone together. 

But now she'll be back in the center. 

She holds secrets from the ones she claims to love. 

I will not be around when she comes. 

She was and always will be first and I last. 

I will always be the outcast. 

At school and at home. 

I am loved by no one. 

I will never let my heart out of its cage. 

It's no longer filled with love, only hate. 

I feel nothing for anyone now. 

Not even hate for the ones who wished I'd drown. 

I know she is the one you all want because she is better. 

So I guess you can have everything you want when I am gone forever.