The Ones For Him

|56|

I was sitting outside in the backyard. I had been thinking about what Amir told me for a while, just lost in my thoughts and thinking.

Did I love Amir? Yes. Do I know that he loves me in more than a friend way? Yes. Have I ever thought about him being more than a friend? Yes. Am I sure about how I feel? I'm not sure...

I groaned and went in the house, heading up to Jace's room and looking through my bag. I went back down to the backyard and lit up the end of the blunt, inhaling as deeply as I could and holding it. I blew the smoke out and sighed, closing my eyes.

My family wasn't home today. My parents were at work, Andy was hanging out with a friend, Jace and Briar had to do something for school, and Amir left earlier to give me space and to just think, but the thinking was starting to annoy me.

"Ugh..."

I went in the house after smoking for a few more minutes and went to look for something to eat. I quickly made myself a sandwich and ate it, then went upstairs to change my clothes.

I was bored just sitting here, so i decided to watch some random standup comedy movie. It was actually really funny, or maybe that was just because I was high, but for some reason, it started to wear off towards the end of the hour long movie.

I started looking around the house but found nothing interesting to keep me busy for the rest of the day. I just sat on the couch and closed my eyes, falling asleep after a few minutes.

At some random point during the day, I woke up to the doorbell ringing and groaned, checking my phone to see if Jace had texted me that he and Briar were on their way back home. There were no messages from him, so I got up and opened the door, watching Amir turn to look at me.

I sort of woke up a bit more and Amir chuckled. "You look...like a mess."

I nodded and opened the door more. "I feel like one, too."

He walked in and I closed the door, sitting on the couch and plopping down. I heard Amir sit across from me and it was just silent.

I sat up once I had enough of the silence and looked at Amir who was busy looking at some of the family pictures on the table beside him. He turned to look at me when I stared at him, and he moved next to me when I patted the space beside me.

I sighed and thought hard once more, before making my decision. I looked at Amir and gave him a small smile, looking away and sighing tiredly.

"I thought about what you said, Amir." I watched his face turn a bit red, and he nodded, his eyes looking hopeful. "And I...I wanna give it try..."

Amir smiled and hugged me tightly, kissing my face repeatedly until I was whining for him to stop. He pulled me back and smiled as he stared at me.

"Thank you, Xavier..."

I nodded and just hugged him, feeling quite happy with my decision. We held each other for a long while and finally pulled away.

While I was thinking about what else I could eat, I could feel Amir staring at me, so I looked up at him in question.

"I'm just so happy." He gently cupped my face and kissed my head, standing up and carrying me to the kitchen. "I'll make you some food, if you want?"

I gasped, "Yes, please!"

Amir smiled and set me on my feet, looking through the fridge and pulling different ingredients out. He started pulling out a few other things, and I sat at the table, laying my head down and watching him.

At times, he would peek over at me and smile. It made me feel really happy and content with things. I was quite happy at the moment and enjoyed it.