ʜᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀ ➵ sᴏᴘᴇ ✔︎

ɪ sᴛɪʟʟ ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ᴛʜɪʀᴅ ᴏғ ᴅᴇᴄᴇᴍʙᴇʀ

Every day gets harder.

Every day, having to deal with those overbearing feelings that drive him absolutely furious — frustrated to the core as to why they just won't go away.

Why, out of everyone on Earth, did he have to fall in love with his best friend?

His best friend, who would end up having eyes for someone else.

But really, it wasn't anyone's fault.

It wasn't Jungkook's so-called foolishness for catching feelings for his childhood best friend, it wasn't Yoongi's for not reciprocating them, and it wasn't even the fault of the person who was the cause of Jungkook's heartbreak.

Because none of those three people had any control over their feelings.

You can't tell your heart to stop aggressively pounding against its chest whenever that said person walks by you, catching yours — and perhaps others' — eyes along the way with their blinding demeanor.

Sure, maybe blame the universe for binding two certain people together in a relationship, two people together who unknowingly would end up crumbling a poor boy's heart to pieces as he watched them from the sidelines; as he watched them kiss and dance in the rain wishing it were him.

Wishing it were him and Yoongi.

So maybe blame the universe for not pairing up Jungkook with the person he had fallen in love for mistakingly, sparing both his mentality and huge heart that could've been savored at the fault of another.

Maybe blame the universe for causing a heart wrenching pain to break through Jungkook's skull, rapturing it until he suddenly looses all sense of reality and decides to put an end to it once and for all. 

But when you're busy blaming something else for the cause of your own downfall, you start to lose a part of yourself to.

☾ ♡︎ ☽

The third of December.

Snowflakes fell all around them, prancing in mid air and gliding along with the whistling wind that echoed from the grey and cloudy abyss — offering nothing but Amherst and heather shades, blocking out all traces of the sun that was hidden somewhere behind all those dull hues.

Yoongi blinked rapidly, frantically trying to sway the snowflakes out of his eyes by swatting them away with his long, luscious eyelashes that everyone grew somewhat envious of since they truly were a gift to have, and he was just lucky enough to own them. And truthfully enough, owning a beautiful pair of eyelashes such as himself, came within many admirers as well.

One of them being Jeon Jungkook.

But that wasn't unusual or odd in his favor.

It was expected.

Coming from a boy who was undoubtedly and hopelessly in love with his best friend, he found some form of fondness in every aspect of Yoongi; from the very bottom of his cute little toes to the tippity top of his hair wisps that he, Jungkook himself, helped dye, which was now a very pleasant shade of umber brown.

A personal favorite of both Yoongi's, and Jungkook's for the matter.

Though, they weren't the only two to find it at least somewhat attractive — since the day Yoongi came to school with a fresh new look blew all of their friends' minds away with how impressive it turned out. But secretly, Jungkook couldn't help but take some pride in that matter, since he knew fully well that he knew what would match Yoongi's aura the best. Whether that be from hair colors and nail polish, to a specific type of style of clothing to wear.

It was a wide range of things, a scale that expanded beyond the imaginable and a spectrum that varied with every category along the way.

From an outside perspective on things, one may initially think that it's creepy or even a tad bit obsessive. But in reality, in the reality where Jungkook had the largest heart in the world that swelled up with an immense amount of vigilance and adornment for his best friend — it really wasn't creepy at all. After all, he knew Yoongi better than anyone else, coming with the advantage of knowing him for over ten years charting all the way back to elementary school.

Yet somewhere along the way of those ten, long years that covered the expanse of his childhood, those once plain platonic feelings morphed into romantic ones.

Because one day, the boy woke up with a sparkle in his eyes with the realization soon dawning in on him that the frequent hammering inside his chest and butterflies always fluttering inside him whenever Yoongi was around was indeed, no coincidence.

At first he was in extreme denial, not wanting to believe that he had actually formed a small crush on his what-to-be-thought best friend.

Well, best friend in Yoongi's eyes.

For Jungkook, it was a completely different case.

Every insignificant hug turned into a heartwarming embrace, every meaningless peck placed on one another's forheads and cheeks just for the fun of it turned into an action that brought a cherry red to his cheeks and flooded his entire system with an indescribable feeling of euphoria.

All those blatantly obvious signs and hints he chose to ignore for years on end, turned into a mind boggling cognizance that ate him alive until his entire sense of reality was gnawed away day by day.

Which brings him here; with one arm loosely wrapped around his friend's shoulders and Yoongi's comfortable snaked around Jungkook's backside. Yet despite for the rather casual position that he's experienced countless times in his life, it never failed to make his stomach explode with butterflies and send electrifying sparks throughout his entire body — still fighting out how to contain it before they spasmed out of control.

Luckily, Jungkook learned some techniques along the way about how to conceal those blazing feelings from the public, a tactic that was basically enforced onto him from day one since he discovered how hopelessly infatuated he was by Yoongi ever since sophomore year.

Two whole years.

Which is why Jungkook eventually came to terms with the fact that these feelings were no ordinary ones.

It wasn't any average crush that just subsided for those self produced yearnings to know the feeling of liking someone, simply acting as a mere placebo effect.

It wasn't an empty void filled with nothing but desire and forcing feelings to blossom, or a simple attraction one may find in all their friends some point in their lives.

It was something more than that, stronger than that, something incomprehensible that even Jungkook still to this day couldn't wrap his head around.

Because the way the simple presence of Yoongi set his heart ablaze, setting his entire soul and body on fire until every single inch of it was burning with amour, told Jeon Jungkook something fucking terrifying.

Told him that he was in love.