ʜᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀ ➵ sᴏᴘᴇ ✔︎

ʙʀɪɢʜᴛᴇʀ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴀ ʙʟᴜᴇ sᴋʏ

With one quick stride in his step, Jungkook turned towards the nearest garbage can with the note in hand, ensuring that Yoongi was well out of sight before fulfilling out his plan that even he himself was beginning to feel guilty about. But something inside him was pulling him towards it; begging him to toss the slim piece of paper inscribed with sweet nothings away into a nonexistent abyss where it'd be gone forever.

Where Hoseok would never be able to find it.

Just throw it away.

Do it.

The little devils spoke to him out of every direction, pulling him towards the gates of hell and further away from the entrance of heaven as his two consciences continuously battled it out in his head over what the fate of this note would be.

Was it selfish? Very much so.

Did Jungkook want Hoseok to revive the note? Fuck no.

Did he feel guilty about it? Yes.

Would he subside his own selfishness and envy for his friend's happiness, or let satisfaction and guilt eat him alive for the rest of eternity?

Boiling green with envy, Jungkook read the note over and over again, as if expecting more words to form on the thin sheet of paper or convey a different message that would somehow mean something deeper than 'you're cute, here's my number'.

But now, stood right in front of the garbage can, he couldn't ignore the signs poking at him from every direction telling him how morally wrong this was, knowing fully well how much confidence and bravery it probably took Yoongi to a scourge up those five overused words on a ripped up piece of spiral notebook paper.

It was a feeling too strong to ignore, too strong to simply pass up or discard without knowing what could possibly end up happening after this selfish act was actually carried out.

And then, suddenly Jungkook felt the touch of Yoongi's lips still lingering on his skin — remembering the amount of ecstasy he felt in that moment not even minutes prior. In fact, he still felt more than overjoyed from it — feeling as if he was soaring freely into the sky and beyond the greatest galaxies that held unexplored worlds and planets that still had yet to be discovered. How the burning sensation spread from where Yoongi pecked him on the cheek to the rest of his body, over flooding him with jubilance and painting his face with a cherry red tint as his heart was set ablaze.

All from a simple peck.

And remembering how happy he felt from a simple peck, made him think how happy Hoseok could feel when seeing this note fall out of his locker the second he opened up the blue metallic door.

Or happy Yoongi felt when Jungkook agreed on keeping his promise to drop it off on his way to class, which he was undeniably late to by now.

Recalling or imagining those moments of exuberance, made Jungkook realize that he couldn't just take those moments away from people because he was too scared to tell Yoongi how he felt, getting a whole two years to do so before Yoongi was now whipped away from his grasp too late and the opportunity was much passed up at this point.

And although it seemed like a good idea to throw the note away along with the rest of the trash piling up in the garbage can in front of him, taken to a landfill until it deteriorated within the Earth's core and the few remnants eaten by wild animals — Jungkook knew it was horribly wrong.

Morally wrong.

He wasn't like that, he wasn't one to take away other people's happiness for his own.

He wasn't one to intrude on his best friend's possible love life or future.

He couldn't just keep Yoongi to himself, despite how much the little devils sitting on his shoulder told him that.