Accidentally Assisting

Chapter 31 - Will you still be there?

WARNING: This chapter deals with triggering topics like depression, suicide,  and death. Read at your own risk. 

...

A few moments later, Jungkook appears in the living room. "Rosie? Are you still up?"

I meet his gaze, trying to appear surprised. "Yeah. I got carried away watching a movie. Where were you?"

"Here and there.", he shrugs, and I step closer to examine his face a bit more. He's never looked this... vulnerable. His hair is a mess, his face puffy and I'm pretty sure his eyes are red even though the cause for that is unclear to me yet.

"Are you okay?", I whisper, not breaking off the intense eye contact for one second. You don't scare me anymore, Jungkook. You haven't in a long time.

"Have you watched the news?", he asks quietly.

"Yes," I answer cautiously. "Yes, I have."

My boss closes his eyes at this, letting out something close to a whimper. "I'm just so tired, Rose."

"You've had a long day."

"No, not of today. I'm tired of everything. Every single fucking thing."

My heart shatters into a thousand pieces at his words. Feeling desperate like he just described is everything I want to protect Jungkook of forever.

Since I'm not sure what to say to him, I follow my instinct and hug him instead, again. I expect him to push me off or to at least scold me because it's inappropriate, but instead, his arms immediately wrap around my still much too frail body. He smells like his usual, earthy perfume, but also like alcohol, which doesn't surprise. I was convinced he was out drinking anyways.

Our hug is very different from the one a few days ago. Last time, I was seeking support from Jungkook, this time, he's seeking support from me. "You can rest on me, always."

"Because you're my assistant?", he mumbles into my shoulder.

"No. Because I'm your friend."

At my words, he hugs me even tighter, his chin resting on my shoulder. "You're so warm. It's so cold outside, and you're so warm. Why is it still so cold outside in April?"

"Umm... I don't know, oppa." The alcohol is making him ramble, how cute. If he wasn't also so obviously sad, I would be amused at his current behaviour.

"Rose?"

"Yes?"

"I think I've had a bit too much."

I'm unsure whether he's talking about alcohol or life.

"It happens to the best of us, oppa. Why don't you just get changed for bed already? I'll being you a glass of water."

"Okay." He slowly frees himself of the hug while offering me thankful smile. A few minutes later, I knock on his door, and he opens it, now changed into nothing but a black T-Shirt and black boxer shorts. I've never seen Jungkook this scarcely dressed, and the sole thought of that makes me blush immediately.

"Here's your water," I hand him the glass.

"Thanks." Then, his eyes glide over my face before adds: "Stay with me, Rosie."

I freeze. "What?"

"Stay with me, just for a while. I don't want to sleep just yet. Sleeping is so lonely."

In my mind, at least ten BigHit managers are yelling at me, reminding me how inappropriate this situation is, but I ignore them. Jungkook needs me.