Climbing the Tower with You (Khun x Reader)

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     ... If I'm ever this late for any fanfic update again (without previously specifying so), I give you guys full permission to spam me until I get a chapter up. 

     I don't say a word as all remaining Regulars gather into the hall after the shocking conclusion of our test. I don't want to. I'm wishing with all my might that this isn't real.

     That another Regular can't really be dead. That Bam isn't really dead. 

     Mr. Lero Ro finally comes in. He tells us that we have all passed the test. So what? Why does any of that matter right now?

     His final words finally bring reality crashing down on me.

     "We searched everywhere throughout the area. There is no trace of him."

     "Bam is dead."

     I feel like I'm in a trance as I walk back to my room. Everyone else went to check on Rachel, but I feel like I might suffocate if I don't get away soon. I need to be alone.

     I sit down on my bed and sigh. I no longer get to hope for a miracle. This is reality. This is the Tower.

     And at that moment, all the emotions I had been suppressing all this time are let out.

     I feel ashamed for crying. Everyone else has been so strong. Strong enough to move forward, to face their fears. I'm none of that.

     In the end, my tears don't fall just because of the loss of a friend. For the first time since entering the Tower, I feel honestly and truly scared.

     I can no longer pretend that I won't be hurt in the Tower. That I can avoid all misfortune I've heard about. In reality, I've barely scratched the surface of the Tower. There will be pain, suffering, and so much more. Why did I let myself live in a fantasy for so long?

     I'm not going to be strong enough to face that. I'm alone. When I reach my hand out to get help when I need it most, nobody will be there to hold it.

     "...Y/n?" There is a small knock on my door. But I can recognize the voice from anywhere.

     "Come in." I say. I quickly rub my eyes, but what I've been doing looks so obvious as A.A. enters the room.

     He doesn't say a word. Instead, he walks into the room and leans against the wall near my bed, waiting for me to collect my thoughts.

     "We all owe Bam." He finally says. I nod in agreement. A.A. continues.

     "We're going to help Rachel go up the Tower. It's the least we can do for Bam. We're going to fulfill his wish."

     That makes a lot of sense. But when I look at A.A., he looks so tired. Like he's just so done with everything.

     In the end, it was A.A. who had spent the most with Bam. Aside from Rachel, this is hitting him the most. He's putting on a brave face now but he's anything but okay.

     I walk up to A.A. and put my hand on his shoulder. I don't know what to say to him, but hopefully my gesture will show that I know he's hurting, and I understand.

     A.A. doesn't shrug it off. "I would ask you whether you want to help us. But that would mean forcing you to continue to climb the Tower." He looks at my face and he can read everything. "I don't know if that's something you want to do."

     I don't say anything to that. But he's right. A.A. sighs.

     "I'm not going to sugarcoat anything. I told you many times that this is what the Tower is like. And it's only going to get worse from here."

     He slowly walks away towards the door. "I'm not going to force you to stay. That's a choice you have to make and I'm okay with anything. However, if you decide to leave..."

     A.A. opens the door, ready to leave. He shoots me one last look. 

     "...that would really suck."

     And with that, he's left, leaving me with my own thoughts.

     And I have a lot to think about.

     Was it a coincidence that at the moment I though I'd have no one to reach out to, he had walked in? Or was my mind trying to tell me something?

     Yes, the Tower would be difficult. And yes, maybe I wasn't strong enough just yet. But I had been lying to myself when I though I was all alone. I'm not.

     I met A.A. in the Tower again. But I'm not done yet. From a young age, I told myself that no matter what hardships I'd have to face, I would find the fulfillment I wanted in the Tower. I need to stay true to those words.

     I don't know the full facts about Krista anymore, but for her sake. mine, and for my first friend, I can't just give up here. I need to keep going.

     I need to keep climbing.

     The next morning:

     "A.A.!" I find him in the hallways and run over to him.

     He looks back. I stand before him, certain of my choice.

     "I'm going to keep climbing. With you."

     A grin comes on his face. "Are you sure you trust me?"

     I smirk. "Of course I do. The most important thing is, will you be able to put up with me?"

     Instead of answering, A.A. puts his hand out, gesturing me to follow him. "Come on, I need to tell you something."

     But that's enough to answer my question. He wants to climb with me as much as I want to go up with him. 

     And with that assurance, I might be able to bear the Tower. And maybe someday, I will savor the experiences it gives me, the good and the bad.

     It all starts with continuing to climb.