Reflect // Van McCann

17. I Brought Someone With Me

*Jess's POV*

Thanksgiving

Before applying to medical school, I've always been set on family medicine, but a small part of me was curious about OB/GYN. Well I'm thankful for rotations because now I know it's something I'm not interested in at all.

OB/GYN was my first rotation of the year and I heard it's one of the worst. Well they're not wrong. Imagine six weeks of being in a toxic environment where everyone talks shit about each other and treats you like you're dumb. I learned to keep my mouth shut and do what I was told. At first, residents would tell me to observe from afar so I felt useless most of the time, but once I earned their respect, they taught me a lot.

I remember being so excited to deliver my first baby but it wasn't anything glamorous. I was so nervous about dropping the baby but luckily didn't. I've been defecated on and covered in so many bodily fluids—I was so done. The best part of my OB/GYN rotation was when it ended.

Up next is internal medicine which is another rotation that most students struggle with. It's interesting but the breadth is huge. There are so many diseases to learn about, I find it overwhelming. I'd work long hours in the hospital learning about a disease a patient has and as soon as I come home, I can't find the energy in me to study.

Although I'm working on Thanksgiving, I'm glad I only have to work a half day and that I have Black Friday off as well. I know I should be putting that time to good use but I specifically put that time aside to spend quality time with my mom and hopefully visit Amy as well.

Ever since Ryan called to tell me the mirror was working again, I found some hope to help me continue. But I was absolutely devastated that Van went to paradise. I felt like I had nothing for me on the other side of the mirror. Well I have Amy but you know what I mean.

I gathered my stuff and said goodbye to everyone. Luckily the drive home wasn't a long one. I felt terrible for not being able to help my mom with the cooking but she understood. What made me feel a little better was that we were having Thanksgiving at the Fuller's house so Liz and Ryan helped with the cooking as well.

I pulled up into the driveway and turned off the engine. It's been a long time since I've been home. I only live half an hour away from home but I never want to drive home after a twelve hour shift at the hospital. That's why I'm renting an apartment that's only five minutes from the hospital so I don't have to deal with the drive. Plus I work the oddest hours. I put my mask on and walked up to the front door to unlock it.

My mom was so busy in the kitchen she didn't even hear me enter. I kicked off my shoes, dropped my stuff onto the couch, and walked over to the kitchen.

"Hi mom!" I said cheerily. It took a lot for me to sound happy even though I felt dead inside.

"Jess, you're home!" my mom shouted. She dropped what she was doing and ran up to hug me but I stopped her.

"Mom, I really love you but I don't want to hug you. I had a brief interaction with a patient that tested positive for COVID-19. I was in full PPE but I'm doing this out of caution," I told her. I felt terrible. The last time I hugged my mom was back in June.

My mom stepped back and adjusted her shirt. "That's alright, I understand."

I walked further into the kitchen, taking a look at what she was making. I could see the turkey in the oven and gravy on the stove. The aroma made me hungry. Dinner can't come soon enough.

"What do you need help with?" I asked.

"Well I just boiled the potatoes. I'll start warming up the milk on the stove. In the meantime, you can start mashing the potatoes."