No Matter What ~ Jackxpenn

Chapter 24 - Tired of Trying

Jack POV

I woke up the following morning with a pounding headache. I tried to stand up but I felt dizzy again and I collapsed back onto the bed. I held my head as thoughts of pain and regret spiraled around inside. Suddenly, memories were triggered from the night before. Jenn..... I cringed and closed my eyes in pain; both from the headache and from memories of her betrayal.

I still refused to believe it. Jenn cheated on me with Jc. What did she see in him? Nevertheless, it still hurt. It hurt knowing I was losing someone I loved, not to mention that I wasn't doing anything to keep her in my life. I was practically watching her walk away. But what if keeping her in my life hurt too? Ugh. Why is this so god damn confusing?

Jenn has tried to text and call me serveral times already. I wanted so badly to answer and hear her voice, but I knew that as soon as I heard it, I would break down and not be able to speak. Maybe some space, and time is what I need. Yeah... That sounds good.

TIME SKIP

I decided to do some shopping at the mall then stop at Starbucks on the way out. Starbucks could always put me in the happiest mood. Oh boy, that's a sign of addiction. I shook off the thought and headed into Top Man. I was in desperate need for some new jeans, being as I had practically torn giant holes on the knees in my favourite pair.

After almost losing my chill on a worker in Top Man, I made it out alive with two new pairs of skinny jeans, thank god. I went into a few other stores, then decided to head to Starbucks. What can I say? Shopping makes a common white boy thristy.

Jenn POV

I groggily opened my eyes, which were red and puffy from crying so much for the past few days. I rubbed my eyes, and reached for my phone on the bedside table, hoping that I would have a text from Jack. Nothing, like usual. I sighed, and checked twitter and instagram. Suddenly, my text tone went off, and I went to see who it was. I almost cringed once I saw who it was from.

Jc: Baby, I know you don't want to respond to me, but please. Why don't we go grab lunch and hang out for a bit today? I can cheer you up :)

I groaned. I guess ignoring him the last time wasn't the best idea. I went to respond with an immediate no, but then I rethought my answer. I guess Jc's not that bad, right? Jack and I are done, and Jc and Lia are done. The most that would ever happen is that we become friends again after this whole fallout. I took a deep breath, responded.

Jenn: Okay sure :) Cheesecake Factory? 1:30?

He responded almost immediately.

Jc: Perfect! It's a date! ;)

My eyes widened. I should have thought this through. It's not date! Definitely not a date! I let out the breath I was holding and sighed. Shit. Jenn why are you so stupid? Okay okay... Just relax. It's fine. Nothing will happen unless you want it to, right? I don't like Jc, I like Ja- But we're done now...... My head suddenly became overwhelmed with worry, concern and regret. What did I get myself into? Why did I say yes? I held my head, wishing it would all go away, but I knew it wouldn't. As I slowly got ready, I kept repeating the same thought in my head: "It's not a date, calm down. It's not a date, calm down." Ugh. I could not wait until this day was over so I could sleep.

TIME SKIP

Before I had to meet Jc at Cheesecake Factory, I decided to do some shopping at the mall. I didn't buy anything, but I just wanted to try and get my mind off of all of this drama. After doing some browsing in H&M, I decided I wanted to grab a quick Starbucks before heading to the restaurant.

As I approached the front door, the colour slowly drained from my face and a flow of old memories and emotions spiraled through my head as I saw him, sitting at a table near the back. Jack. My Jack.

Jack POV

I sat at a table near the back with my vanilla frapp scrolling through my twitter feed, laughing slightly at some of the tweets that my fans tweeted me. I had ended up meeting Claudia at Starbucks because she was in town for a few days for some meetings and more youtube stuff. She just left to go the bathroom when a familar voice shook me from my thoughts.

"Jack?" It was a voice I knew too well. It was Jenn's voice. Oh my god.

I looked up at her, not knowing what to say. A flood of memories and old emotions came back, overwhelming me. No Jack, she hurt you. I had to admit, Jenn looked especially beautiful today. Stop it Jack! I examined her face, trying to read her expression. Even though her eyes were puffy and red, they still had a slight sparkle. Had she been crying?

She laughed slightly, biting her lip at the awkward silence, snapping me back into reality. "Oh hey, Jenn," I said, looking down. I couldn't look at her eyes. I knew as soon as I did, I would fall back in love with her. I had to keep reminding myself that she could hurt me again.

Jenn took a deep breath, "How have you been?" she managed to say, looking down as well.

I sighed. I really didn't feel like talking right now. I thought about walking away right then and there, but realized that would be pretty douchy, and Jenn didn't deserve that. God, why do I still feel so much sympathy for her? Then the sudden thought crossed my mind. Do I still love Jenn? No no! Of course not!

Jenn sighed, slightly annoyed, not letting me respond, "Okay Jack, cut the crap,"

My eyes snapped to hers. Crap. Why did I do that? I looked down again, "What do you mean?"

She crossed her arms, and looked down. Even though she was angry with me, you could clearly see hurt in her grey blue eyes.

Jenn looked up at me again, "Why are you avoiding me?" she said quietly, then continued, "I've tried Jack. I've called, I've left voicemails, I've apologized.... W-what more do you w-want?" Jenn stuttered, clearly trying to hold back tears.

I opened my mouth to speak, but Claudia's voice interupted me.

"Oh hey Jenn," she said, examining her up and down. She scoffed, then continued, "What is she doing here?" Claudia said quietly into my ear, making me shiver.

I looked back at Jenn. Her eyes were starting to water, and she turned away to make sure I didn't see her cry. She sniffed, and started to walk away. On her way out, I heard her croak out, "I g-guess you've m-moved on then. I-I'm gonna g-go"

I stood up to run after her, but Claudia put a hand on my shoulder to stop me. She turned to me, "Jack let it go. She obviously doesn't care about you if she cheated on you," rolling her eyes.

I shook my arm out of her grasp, and ran out the door into the parking lot. I couldn't watch Jenn walk away from me. I needed her. I looked around desperately, but she was already gone. I collasped into my arms, sitting on the curb. Why did I let her go?

Author's note: Hey guys! Sorry I forgot to update! But here's a nice long chapter for you :)