May we meet again (Clexa)

Chapter 16

Clarke sat in the semi circle, half listening to the group speak about how their lives were while drinking and the effects it had on their loved ones, Clarke had always chosen to not participate, but Niylah hadn't showed up as their coach and so the available psychologist required everyone to talk.

She had to admit her insides were twisting and turning at the thought of not seeing Niylah, why had she not come? Was it because of yesterday?

"Clarke?" Dr Becca gestured at her to stand and say something.

"Uh... Hi, I'm Clarke." She waved.

"Hi, Clarke." The group chorused.

"Well my life has been pretty good until I lost my sister when I was sixteen, but then I was alright about that because I had writing, and then my fiancé died and I kind of just lost it
I missed her, all the time and I turned to drinking, I just never realized it had gotten out of control. "

She breathed out a shaky breath, having to tell all these strangers about her life wasn't her favorite cup of tea, why did she even have to do it, she didn't see the point in it.

"I was the one driving when she died, but then I found out that she is not dead, after five years of ruining my life she rose from the dead," Clarke chuckled as she saw the faces of the people around her, she looked down and kicked her foot forward lightly, looking back up she crossed her arms together and continued.

"She faked her death but kind of forgot to tell me, but I'm trying to be okay now, I have my family, and friends who are supporting me... Uh -- Yeah that's about it, thank you."

Clarke took a seat and watched as the room fell silent for a considerable amount of time, she didn't like sharing, but it did leave her with some lightness in her heart, sharing meant she didn't have to keep the burden all to herself, she made a promise to herself that next time she'd talk too.

"No wonder you're so messed up," A teenage girl spoke, Clarke glared at her, but looked away just as fast, she was right, messed up was the right word she'd use to describe herself.

"I think she's brave." Charlotte interjected, "It's because you don't know her, but I know she's the bravest person I've met."

Clarke looked over at Charlotte and offered a light smile, she didn't believe one word she'd said, but didn't mean it wasn't true. We believe terrible things about ourselves, but put others in pedestals, she knew that.

"Thank you for sharing, Clarke." Dr Becca said, she didn't know Clarke, but she had an idea that Charlotte was indeed correct.

Clarke crossed her legs and stared at the door, part of her hoped that Niylah would eventually show up, Apologize for being late and life would go on but Group work had been over and no sign of her.

She laid in her bed, facing the wall as she imagined many scenarios where Niylah was infact not avoiding her but it all went back to that. She had to be, they went beyond just patient and doctor last night.

Clarke knew that that line had been crossed a long time ago, the minute Niylah began having all her meals with her, when they went out jogging, the sweets Clarke often brought for her, the lines had been blurred for longer than both women cared to admit but now, now they were completely crossed and there was no avoiding it anymore.

"Dude you came in late last night, waking me up and now you keep sighing every second, what's up?"
Charlotte sat up on her bed and looked at Clarke who was curled in a ball.

"I'm sorry for... I don't know annoying you or whatever," Clarke said, "I'll just take a walk,"

She got to her feet, but Charlotte hurriedly blocked her way. "We're friends, and friends help each other, isn't that what Dr N has been saying talking helps,"