May we meet again (Clexa)

Chapter 8

"Echo." Octavia said, looking at everyone around the table, "Are you sure it was Clarke, our Clarke, as in Clarke Freaking Griffin, Clarke... Famous writer and Painter--"

"Say Clarke one more time O and I'll mess up that pretty face of yours." Raven said, turning her attention back to Echo.

"How did she look?" She asked

"I don't know, Sad and broken... We have to help her guys, we have to go knock some sense into that thick skull of hers and get our girl back." Echo said

"I second that." Raven, who had been chatting with Luna on her phone looked up and added to their non-existent plan on getting Clarke help.

"I've tried, but Clarke...it's like she's gone. I'll call mom, though and maybe we could all try. " Raven said, 

"Then it's done, I'll call up the gang and we get our Clarke back." Octavia said.

Raven kissed her wife's cheek and got up, "I will see you at home, O and I should head back to work."

"Same," Echo replied.

"Have I told you how good your ass looks?" Anya asked, grabbing Raven's behind causing her to squeel and the others to roll their eyes and fake gagged at the interaction.

"It's pretty good isn't it." Raven tried to turn back and look at her behind.

"We won't hear the end of it." Echo rolled her eyes as they exited the restaurant.

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Clarke stared at the white wall as tears trickled down her rosy cheecks, her hands wrapped tightly around her frail skeleton of a body.

She wanted to go home so badly it hurt, her body shook as her heart beat fast and her body shaking so badly she wanted to scream, scream so loud that someone would come and help her, but she knew if she screamed she wouldn't get a hug and it's all going to be okay, she had learnt the hard way.

Five nights ago she was banging on the door, demanding to be let out, to go home, she had expected to be comforted, but all she got was being held down by two mascular men, knees pressing on her shoukders she swore they'd break any moment but they never did, and all in all she still had 5 months and 26 days and today just happened to be her first therapy session.

"Hi, Clarke." Niylah smiled brightly as she ushered her into the small room Clarke noticed the flowers on the desk, a cabinet on the corner, achievements of the doctor framed and put up on the walls, everything was according and yet it made her feel uneasy.

She found if she stared at the blonde woman with green eyes she began to calm down

"I'm Dr Dean, but you can call me Nylah, how are you feeling today? I've heard it's been hard?"

"I'm fine." Clarke sighed as she plopped her body on the surprisingly conformable brown sofa.

"Okay," Niylah sighed as she knew where this was going, but her smile never faltered. "Is there something you'd like to talk about today?" She asked

"You know Niylah is a Champion's name." Clarke had come across the name while she was doing research on the names of her characters in her books.

"I did know that." Niylah smiled thoughtfully. "What does Clarke mean?"

Clarke stared at the green orbs as the woman began chattering away, her eyes never leaving the green that calmed her down. "You have really green eyes." she answered instead.

"I've been told," Niylah pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and joined her hands together, leg resting on the other leg. "What's on your mind?" She rephrased her question

"Nothing really." Clarke finally tore her eyes away from the blonde and stared at the flowers, Lillies, white lillies. She wished she could smell them, feel their touch on her hands, but wasn't sure if she was allowed so instead she swung her head fast and looked at the woman.

"You can't fix me," She whispered softly, "I'm beyond repair."

"And why do you believe yourself to be broken, Clarke?"

"Because I just am, I know you want to hear about my problems and you think you can fix me, but that's the problem isn't it? you can't really help me until you spend time inside my head, until you dance with me demons, until you hear the memories play over and over in your head."

"I'm not trying to fix you, because I don't believe that people are broken, I believe they just have a lot of baggage they're carrying with them and my job is to unload that baggage so you can breathe, and it's true I have no idea what's happening inside your head, but I can help if you let me in."

Clarke got up from her seat and walked over to the desk, she moved her hand to touch the petals of the flower, so soft and delicate, full of life. Lillies were Jo's favorite flowers, she suddenly remembered and smiled at the thought of her late twin sister.

That was the only death she took hard, but bounced back from. Jo had died from hitting her head whilst rididng her bike, Clarke had always hated that stupid red bike, but Jo loved it so much so that it killed her, she never really spent time with her dad, he was always working until the building collapse that killed half the employees of the tech company he worked at.

Clarke's eyed scanned the room, brown cabinet on the corner, dark brown desk, red mat near the couches and a glass coffee table lay on top of the mat. The dream office.

"Why are you here Clarke?" Niylah finally asked the question she was required to ask, her job forced her to ask this particular question.

"Do you like roses?" Clarke asked instead.

"Yes but I prefer Daisy's be-"

"because in a field of roses you'd pick a daisy, I know." Clarke turned around and smiled at the woman "I don't want to talk anymore, I'm going to go." She moved away from the flowers and stood by the door.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow then."

She made her way back into her room, she had gotten offers from the others to join them in table tennis, the only game everyone seemed interested in.

Clarke didn't want to be around poeple, five years alone had made her love being alone, that's what she had told herself time after time, but the truth was  she was afraid to lose poeple again, to lose people she loved and cared for.

She got under the covers of her bed and laid there, yawned so her ears could pop and she could listen to her heartbeat, a slow rhythm of a drum roll in her chest, once it had been alive, but now it wasn't anything, empty, she felt empty and no matter how much she focused she would always feel numb.

She fell asleep to the sound of her heart rocking against her ribcage, the only thing keeping her alive, her savior and destroyer.

The heart is capable of love and if it weren't for the love she had for her mother she wouldn't have been here, she would be with Lexa, happy.

She woke up feeling a bit better than she had before she fell asleep. It was past 8 in the morning and they would start serving breakfast soon. She got up and made her way into the bathroom.

After dressing up in a yellow dress she slowly walked down to the hall where they served breakfast.

After a light meal of oats, she walked down the long corridors of this place , running her hand on the rough wall.

 She lightly knocked on the door infront of her, leaning on the wall she waited for it to be opened and for her to welcomed inside.

The door was pulled open and Clarke turned around, facing the green eyes and blonde hair, loosely tied together.

"Hi, Clarke, Come in."

°°°

I love psychology, probably going to be my future occupation...

What do you want to be? Maybe I'll get my second option from you guys...