Kai's life was close to perfection but due to his inability to hear, the loss of communication became a hindrance to having a normal life. Despite having troubles, he tried his best to cope with his underlying situation. Carrying the disability for...
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Chapter 5
"So, how do you think this therapy is beneficial for you, Kai?" Miss Sandra asked. We're on our weekly session again and at this hour, gusto kong matulog na lang dahil sa sobrang boring ng pinag-uusapan namin. She wants my input now, she wants communication, and she wants to see the development of how we interact with each other.
I'm not saying it is working for me though. Miss Sandra shows effort and that's a big move for her. Kahit pakiramdam ko na napipilitan lang din siyang gawin ang trabaho niya sa amin, she doesn't mind, because at the end of the day, she gets paid very well.
"It's great," I signed, which doesn't really show my true emotion with it. I just said that because that's what she wanted to know and I'll give that to her. "I've learned something more about myself."
She gave me a warm smile. I know that at some point, she was just trying to give me a positive outlook in life that doesn't put myself in jeopardy at all times. Inakala kasi ng parents ko na I tried to killed myself. They thought I overdosed myself from those drugs which was far from what I'm thinking of. It's a temptation, but I've never thought that it would be hard to be in that situation. Those people who didn't make it under the same situation, my heart rests for them. They deserve more than the cruelty of this world.
"I think we'll just end this session at this point. But I will leave you with an assignment and I hope you'll be able to do what I ask, alright, Kai?" She sounded hopeful so I nodded to her. "I want you to present to me something that you want to do but you can't because of your impairment. I won't rush you to explore yourself from all the stuff you think you may possibly do. In our next two or three sessions, maybe we'll tackle it. From now on, I'll just go and let you have a rest."
Miss Sandra prepared her things and left me alone in the session room they called.
May mga oras talagang nakakabagot makisama sa ibang tao lalo na kapag natapat ng tanghaling tapat. Sinunod ko na lang ang gusto nila para sa akin. I won't rebel for it because they thought it's the best thing for me. Tinitingnan ko naman kung anong magiging result nito para sa akin. I'm open to anything pero minsan may mga bagay lang talagang hindi na nakakaganda para sa atin. It brought ourselves to the worst situations.
Nagpalipas muna ako ng ilang sandali sa loob ng session room. Tumayo ako sa harap ng bintana kung saan tanaw rin ang garden sa direksyong ito. I just remember what happened last time, it somehow brought panic to them. Kung nag-stay ako at hindi na nag-isip ng kung ano-ano, I wouldn't sit with Miss Sandra every Friday for our session. I guess this was all my fault, this was all my wrongdoings and I need to straighten it all out.
I kept looking at the wrong side that it was my parents who made it impossible for me to be normal. At ngayon, with all the sessions I had with Miss Sandra, sa tingin ko wala sa kanila ang problema, sa tingin ko nasa sa akin na. Ako lang din ata ang nag-iisip na may problema sa akin. Even though there's a lot of people shaming me, hindi ko naman kailangan dibdibin o gawing personal because in the first place, people shouldn't belittle someone else just because they were impaired.
