lunch time // seungjin

五

tw! self harm

you see , seungmin is a smart boy , he doesnt cut on his wrists because it'll be noticed by people and he may get into trouble . he cuts on his upper arm , as long as he wears long sleeve shirts no one would notice , smart right ?

he pressed the sharp blade into his upper arm and dragged it across , another sharp sensation shot up his arm . seungmin groaned in pain , timidly raising his head to look at the mirror . he couldnt help but smile at the blood that was starting to run down his arm , why did he feel so satisfied?

"one "

"two "

"three "

"four "

seungmin stopped at four , he always did . ( a/n four in chinese is 四 and it is a very inauspicious number to the chinese because its sounds like 死 which is death ) the boy likes the number because of the meaning behind it ,death . something he wants but has to courage to commit .

" why am i doing this to myself ha " seungmin chuckled and sighed as the person in the mirror looked back at him . skin littered with hickeys , choking marks that now turned purple into bruises , dripping blood , face stained with dries tears . seungmin couldnt recognize himself anymore , he didn't want this body anymore .

seungmin didnt attend school for the next few days , his teachers were worried sick because seungmin was a top student and he never skipped school without a valid reason . he stayed in bed for days , refusing to eat anything , drifting in and out of consciousness . he often cried himself to sleep sometimes he even woke up crying from nightmares of the incident .

" hey baby , i heard from the helper that you haven't been going to school lately . i dont know what happened but if you need us to be back in korea with you , tell us okay ? eomma and appa will always be trying our best to help , please be strong for us son . remember eomma and appa loves you . " seungmin's mum sent him a voice message that made seungmin really guilty , "i shouldnt worry eomma and appa, i shouldnt be a hassle, i need to be strong for them, i need to be strong. " he gave himself a tiny pep talk before finally dragging himself out of his blanket burrito that he has been camping in for the past 8 days .

seungmin stood infront of the mirror and his heart still dropped seeing the faint marks left . the purple bruises have now faded into yellow patches , the hickeys were almost gone but there was still yellow spots replacing the hickeys . then there were the bite marks that was left that was still pretty noticable . the boy had no idea how to feel about going to school , chances are hyunjin wont remember him but the possibility of bumping into the beast quickened his heart rate .

say hi to the worst filler ever :D

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