call me back? •billie eilish book•

twenty six

wow i haven't updated in a long time sorry
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recap
...They wanted nothing but the best for her but it was very clear she didn't want that for herself.

She doesn't think she deserves happiness, or really anything for that matter.

She was her own worst enemy.
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•• Laila's pov ••

I've been at Andrews house for the past two nights.

It's actually been fun. We've done a lot of baking, watching movies, crafts. He's been really good with getting my mind off things. I told him about my whole current situation,,although leaving a few parts out. I didn't come out to him so I had to shift the story slightly. I basically told him I don't feel welcome at home right now because I told my parents I didn't want to practice Christianity anymore and they were really hurt and upset by it. I had a very short amount of time to figure out what to say and that's the best I could come up with. I mean he believed it so I guess it worked. Maybe he's just really gullible.

He said getting back in touch with my siblings would be good for my mental health so I texted them last night letting them know I was okay and all that fun stuff. We've been talking ever since, I really miss them. We planned to meet up tomorrow at the ice cream shop down the road. I haven't even thought twice about messaging my parents yet. I'm not ready to see them.

The thought of B word hasn't came into my mind once. Except for now. And the time I was thinking about the fact that I wasn't thinking about her. Well wait, have I really been thinking about her this whole time, the thought of not thinking about her never leaves my mind. So am I really just always thinking about he-

"Laila?"

"Yes"

"Are you good" Andrew looks at me with a worried expression, I just nod in response "You look like you have something bothering you" I shake my head "Wanna make cookies"

I immediately jump off his bed and run down the stairs. I can faintly hear him say "I guess that's a yes" to himself.

Andrews parents aren't home right now so I'm able to just wear his shirt that fits me like a dress, I already had a long conversation with him about how I'm keeping this shirt, it's really cute. If his parents were here I'd be considerate and put on some pants just cause I don't think I have that type of relationship with them yet. They are really sweet people don't get me wrong but I've only just met them and I really want to make a good impression. Reminder this is my first boyfriend and I'm trying really hard not to fuck anything up.

He finally makes his way down the stairs, I pop myself up on the counter watching him as he grabs everything to the make cookies.

Fun fact about Andrew he makes the best cookies. He told me he got the recipe from his great grandma. I asked for the recipe but apparently it's a secret annoying.

"You need to stop looking at me like that" He laughs

"Or what"

Putting himself in between my legs, he gently places his hands on either side of my face...

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flashback