Love's Deception

Chapter 37 - Opportunities

Life can pull you in different directions. Sometimes you feel like your life is heading down the right path and BAM! Another path opens up for you to take. Should you follow the path you know and the path you've been taking? Or do you take a risk and follow the new path into the unknown?

It can be difficult to make this decision, especially when there's something pulling you towards one path. That something could be an object, a single thought, or a person. With this 'something', you need to decide if you can stand to live without it. Can you survive a day away from it? Could you survive a lifetime without it?

Taking one path may close up the other path so that you can no longer take it, should you realize you made a mistake. So this decision is very monumental. You want to have your decision to feel like the right one and not have regrets. So tell me, can you survive without that 'something'? And even if the answer is yes, is it worth potentially losing it?

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It's been six months. Six months ago I was at a low point in my life. I almost lost my job, I lost my mom, and I lost the love of my life. People say that time heals, well, unfortunately for me that statement was proven false. Here I am, six months after everything happened and I still feel as shitty as I did then.

During these six months, I've been focusing on work. I've been throwing myself into my work to distract myself from all the pain I was feeling. It wasn't smart, but it worked. Drowning yourself in your work can sometimes help hide every other feeling that you have because you're so busy you don't notice any other feeling but the feeling of hard work.

Cam and I have been working on a new case that we started after we finished the one we were working on six months ago. We finished that case quickly and had opened a new one, a better one. We both have been working hard, staying late, coming in early, and doing all we can to crack this because it's been difficult.

Cam has been worried about me, especially since I stay at work sometimes until 1 AM and then go home to sleep and I come back at 6 AM. He keeps telling me I need more sleep, but really I don't. Who needs sleep when there's a case to be worked on?

He keeps telling me that I need to go home at night, but honestly, what's the point? He gets to go home to his wife and daughter, I go home to an empty apartment that only has the memories of everything I've lost.

Besides, this new case is too good to take a break from. A drug dealer, my favorite. These guys typically aren't ones to cover their tracks, not like Natalia was. And he doesn't belong to any organization like the Cobras. He's going to be an easy catch.

If all goes according to plan, we should be able to arrest him very soon. I'm so excited to finish another case. It's like an addiction. Once you close one case, you just want to close hundreds.

I've been trying not to think of anything that happened six months ago. My mom's death, my breakup with Jace. It all just brings such bad memories back to me.

I remember the first time I saw my mom's grave. It was planted right next to my dad's. They're together now at least. Reunited at last.

I mourned my mom for a long time. Each day was harder than the last. Each day it hit me more that I can't go over to my mom's house anymore, I can't pick up the phone and call her, I'll never hear her voice again.

Aidan was struggling as well. He took time off work when he got back to Nevada. Luckily, he had Shana there to make sure he was alright. I had Cam, Paige, and Billings who were making sure I was alright.

For the first week after my mom died, Cam and his wife, Ana, invited me over for dinner multiple times. I know it was for pity, they didn't want me to be alone, but I'm fine with that. I didn't want to be alone either.