The G Word.

22.

"Mike have you seen Alex or Sophie anywhere" I ask jogging up to him .
"Oh no sorry I haven't ." He says opening his locker to change books for our next class .

"Aren't you guys best friends? Shouldn't you like have trackers on eachother or something ?" He asks eyeing me suspiciously .
"I've tried searching everywhere but it's like the don't want to be found ." I sigh frustratedly .

"Well ,it's only the beginning of the day , you have classes with them and you sit together ." He's right  , I should probably stop worrying so much over this.
I'll see them and we'll talk , it's all good .

" you're right ."I say as we head  to our next class together .

**********

I didn't see either of them at lunch so I'm hoping they'll be in class today . At this point I'm not even sure if they came to school .
I lay my head on my left palm and tap impatiently on my desk.
A few seconds before the bell rings they both walk into class , I try whispering their names so the teacher doesn't hear me .

"Alex! Sophie !" I try again .
Alex finally turns to me but she immediately redirects her gaze to another seat which she and Sophie proceed to take .
Okay so it's definitely confirmed , they are ignoring me .

I can't focus on what the teacher is saying , I keep searching my mind for any evident reason as to why they are ignoring me .
The most recurring thought is that I've been spending a lot of time  with other people specifically the ones they hate .
I can recall a multiple number of times when Alex tried telling me something that sounded pretty serious but I never let her finish.
I always ended up thinking about ...Lee .

Aw crap.

How could I not see this .

I've been nothing but a total trash of a friend , Alex probably had another issue at home .
I wasn't there for her , she only ever speaks to me about it .

Quinn you're so stupid ! Stupid! Stupid !

I just broke her trust , Alex doesn't easily open up and now thanks to my dumb decisions , she's going to shut me out again .

I've gotta talk to her ASAP.

I tear out a piece of paper from the back of my note book and start scribbling down an apology .

I'm so sorry lex please , don't hate me ...
Can we talk after this ?

No that wouldn't work   , she'll probably chew  the note before she reads it .

Alex isn't the easiest person to apologise to . I need to talk to her in person , and prepare myself for whatever bomb she might have in store waiting to drop on me .
My guess, nuclear .

Sophie isn't talking to me either so something must be wrong , she's not one to ignore people especially not me .

Suddenly I feel this wave of fear and anxiety wash over me . My feet start tapping against the tiled floor continuously . Uneasy and confused .
My palms are getting really sweaty , I'm hot and cold at the same time . My stomach feels like it's boiling on the inside .
I start biting on my pen cap to calm down .
The reality that I might be loosing my friends is setting in pretty heavily , the loud electric bell snaps me out of my anxiety attack . My eyes immediately fall on Alex and Sophie , they're leaving .

I quickly gather my books but I have to wait for the multitude of students to walk out before I can .
Once I'm out , I can't see them . I missed them again .