little love

8

when calum woke up that next morning, he was alone. and, he didn't understand why that bothered him as much as it did. like, waking up next to ashton after hard sex was so comforting to him, and now that he's alone...calum just doesn't like it.

calum also knows he could be overthinking. ashton could be using the bathroom, or making breakfast (thats what he told himself. ashton has things to do, he doesn't need to stay in bed until i wake up). 

calum just stays curled up in bed for a bit, sucking on his paci and cuddling with his stuffed dog (that helped calum with all of the bad feelings and the bad thoughts that swam around inside of him. there were so many things that bothered him and he wasn't quite sure where everything was going and where they stood in their relationship. these feelings were all new, yet there was still the same love bonded between them. calum knew that would never change. no matter what came between them).

after spending way too much time thinking, the little decided to get up. his daddy never came for him so he assumed that his daddy was just doing something more important (again, that's what he told himself. maybe his daddy was cleaning in the living room or maybe he was reorganizing the garage - either way it had to be something major since it was more important than him).

calum still can't figure out this weird feeling...this weird direction things seem to be going. like, they acted fine around each other but every little thing (like waking up alone) put another crack in calums heart. was it affecting ashton the same way. was ashtons heart breaking a little more? calum wasn't sure, but the thought of ashtons heart breaking broke calums heart even more.

"daddy?" calum calls out as he pads down the stairs, and straight to the kitchen. his stuffed dog stayed held against his chest as his paci bobs in his mouth.

the kitchen was empty.

calum noticed the coffee mug on the table, along with the pan on the stove. as calum got closer, he noticed that it was dirty from ashton making eggs...

for himself. it make something new bloom in calums chest - they always ate breakfast together. his daddy always made both of them eggs, and then sprinkled some shredded cheese on top. the fact that ashton got up by himself, made breakfast for one, and is no where to be found...

it made anger bloom in calums chest.

little calum, and big boy calum, couldn't figure out why ashton was acting the way that he was.

the anger soon ran through his bloodstream. so, calum set his stuffie down on the table, turned over to the stove, and grabbed the pan off of the stove. calum looked at it for a couple seconds, frowned a bit, then let out an angry scream as he threw the pan at the wall.

it immediately created a whole in the wall, and scraped away some of the paint around it.

it made calum feel a little better. ashton hurt his heart, so calum left a hole in the wall. yet, it didn't make him feel better. that seemed to have gotten ashtons attention (wherever he was. calum was still staring at the wall as he breathed heavily so he didn't see where ashton came from).

"calum, are you - what the fuck?"

calum turns around, and does his best to stare at him as angry, warm tears rolled down his cheeks.

"what the fuck did you do?" ashton exclaims, picking up the pan off the floor.

"you're an asshole!" calum hiccups, trying his absolute best to keep his composure. it wasn't working because of the longer he stared at ashton, the more swirl of emotions calum felt quickly shooting up his throat. ashton hust narrows his eyes, and basically throws the pan into the sink.

"what did i do now?!"

"you...y-you got u-up without me! you a-ate breakfast w-without me!"

"are you serious?! thats why you put a hole in our wall?!" ashton exclaims. his face was red from anger - thats all that filled the room. anger.

it kept getting heavier and heavier since they were both angry. they were basically feeding off of each others anger.

"y-yes!" calum sobs. his little fists were clenching and unclentching due to his anxiety sky rocketing. ashton wasn't having any of it.

"you're such a brat, calum!" ashton yells, "putting holes in our walls because i didn't eat breakfast with you! grow up, for real!"

ashton storms over to the doorway, and then turns around to look at calum who stood in the same place, sobbing.

"you better stay away from me for the rest of the day, or i won't hesitate to beat your ass."

ashton walks out, leaving calum alone. the smaller boy falls onto the ground, curls into a ball, and continues to sob.

through his sobs, he hears ashton open a door, and then shut it. calum assumes the worst (like always).

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