little love

26

"ashy?"

"yeah?"

"does this mean...i can come back home?"

"how about, you stay here four nights a week and stay with michael for the other nights? i think rekindling your friendship with michael would also help with your anxiety."

calum sighs, and before he can speak ashton speaks again, cutting calum off.

"calum, i know what you're thinking. this isn't going to work if you dont let it. i need you to be able to function without me, yeah? remember when i said that?"

"i know," calum whispers, pouting at ashton, "i just...don't like the thought of being without you. even sleeping without you..."

"you know why we need to do this then, yeah?"

calum nods. of course he knows why. ever since he saw ashton, and he felt that unfamiliar feeling in his gut, he knew there would be a huge attachment to him. and, calum loves ashton more than anything. yet, ashton was right. calum didn't think he was selfish, per say, because he loved ashton and all he wanted was to make ashton proud.

at the same time, he just didnt want to be apart from him.

in the back of calums mind, he knew it was coming. there was always that fear factor working in the back of his mind, creating scenarios where ashton wasnt with him. calum knew at some point he was going to need to work on being his own person, on being able to function and think without ashton. now that he's having to face that reality...it is scary. its so unbelievably scary to calum.

the one thing that has always stopped him too, was ashton. the moment something got to close, or too scary, there he was. it was almost like he was hiding under ashtons wing - under his love and care.

"callie? baby? you're spacing out again on me, love."

calum blinks a couple times, and turns to look at ashton. the small boy felt like he could start crying. all he could see in ashtons eyes were love. just pure love, and calum would fo anything for ashton. anything for their relationship.

"s-sorry," calum says, feeling that familiar crawl under his skin, "i-i just haven't b-been little a-a lot l-lately."

"okay, that's fine. why dont you go into headspace, yeah? i'll call mikey and let him know you'll be staying with me again tonight."

calum nods a little too desprately. so, ashton places a quick kiss to calums head and then bounds out of the room to let michael know.

it doesn't take calum long to fall into headspace. the boy was on egde, especially since he hadn't been in his headspace that much. one thing that did change, though, was the littles confidence.

little calum wasnt sure what to do, and what was okay with his daddy. so, the little just sat patiently and waited. when ashton came back into the room, and sat down, he could see the wavering in his eyes.

"sweetheart, come sit on daddys lap."

calum bites his lip, so ashton pats his lap and smiles.

"come sit on daddys lap, sweet pea."

calum scrambles up, and right onto ashtons lap. the little easily melts into ashtons touch, and is pliant in ashtons arms.

"daddys good boy, huh?" ashton asks, and then runs his hand through calums curly, thick hair. calum giggles, nods, and nuzzles his head up into ashton's hand. they stayed like that for awhile. calum curled up against ashtons chest, with ashton softly petting calums hair.

"hey, sweetheart," ashton starts as he feels calums body start to slump, meaning he was falling asleep, "why dont we go cuddle in bed?"

"wewie?"

"of course, bub. let's go."

calum gets up, and then grabs ashtons hand once the other boy was up. they walk to their bedroom, hand in hand.

"you think you can change into some pajamas yourself, sweetheart?"

"yeah, daddy."

calum goes to their shared closet, and grabs out one of ashtons hoodies. the little wanted to be surrounded by his daddy. so, he throws the hoodie on the bed and starts to take off his clothes.

the little manages to strip down naked, but when he starts to get the hoodie on...somehow he gets his head into the arm sleeve and he doesn't know how to fix it so he starts to whine.

luckily, ashton was watching with a smile the whole time.

"you need some help there, love?"

"i do it, daddy."

"let me help you, silly boy," ashton chuckles, helping calum. they get the hoodie onto him, then ashton decides to put a pull up on calum just in case he had an accident.

then, they curl up in bed. calum basically laid on top of ashton, since he still needed to be close to ashton. ashton held calum close, and breathed in the familiar scent (that he admittedly had grown to miss).

calum falls asleep easy.

ashton lays awake, thinking. all he wanted, was the absolute best for calum. and the absolute best, he would get.

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gonna have some little cal in the next couple chapters bc i miss him
comments? predictions?
love u!