The Difference Between You and Me

Chapter 18

"Mom. Do you have any more pancakes?" Tristan greedily asked with his mouth filled with half chewed food.

"No, Ammie is taking the rest to school," Katy said. Ammie liked taking her breakfast to school because she couldn't eat so early in the morning and she liked having breakfast for everything else except for breakfast; brunch, lunch or even an afternoon snack.

"Can I have one Ammie, please?" Tristan grinned, batting his eyelashes at Ammie for added effect. But Ammie ignored his attempt at looking like an adorable six year because he looked constipated instead.

"No, goodbye"

"Witch"

"Pest"

"Bye honey!" Katy shouted from the kitchen as Ammie was about to close the front door. Finally, outside, Ammie took a deep breath in and relish the fresh air. She turned on the sidewalk and began her journey to school.

Ammie thought about what her mother said yesterday about her being ungrateful. She didn't expect her to have said that because though she was a lot of things, but she knew she was always grateful, for the sacrifices Katy made for her every day. She knew she can be a bit gloomy or bitter or downright rude but she had a reason, life dealt her a bad deal and there was no need to go into her life's story but pretending everything was and is peachy is not something she was interested in doing, the life of hypocrisy and pretence was getting old really.

I hurt people often but it's something I got used, she whispered to herself, take solace in the fact that I've been used too. Had my heart beaten black and blue, it's been abused too. But I heard I look good in those colours, so I'm not pressed about the changes.

Melancholy Minds had a poem or quote for everything. He knew what life was and that was refreshing. Ammie thought about her mother's job offer in San Francisco. She was finally considering opening up a little to people as maybe they weren't such horrible beings after all. She didn't want to hold her mom back, but another move would just make her even more depressed. It all was selfish talk anyways considering she'll be moving away to college at New York University, and moving to San Francisco will mean a better life for her brothers and Katy.

Beep beep

Ammie suddenly heard a car horn honking at her disrupting her little reverie. Pausing she wondered if she had somehow wandered into the middle of the road. Snapping out of her trance she began to frantically look around, realizing she was still on the sidewalk her breathing slowed and she continued walking.

Beep beep

She heard the car horn again. Glancing to her right she noticed a white Audi which she didn't notice before. The heavily tinted windows slowly rolled down and a head stuck out the driver's side.

"Hey, need a ride to school," Josh asked smirking but Ammie rolled her eyes and walked off at a much faster pace.

"Hey that's no way to treat a friend," Josh pouted, driving alongside Ammie who was on the verge of running.

"We are not friends," she bit through clenched teeth

"Aww, don't say that honey," Josh cooed

"Look I don't want a ride from you, so just leave me alone okay," Ammie jogged away leaving Josh feeling slightly hurt.

---

It was lunch time and Ammie was sitting outside on a bench staring at nothing in particular, the light wind tickled her face and kept her cool. She did not feel hungry and so had skipped lunch and Jade wasn't at school today it seemed. Ammie watched as a hungry bird wrestled with an earthworm who was in turn fighting for its dear life and thought about how simple life was. You live then you die. Our time on this earth is shorter than we can ever imagine but the most important question that confronts us all is what will the life in our years look like at the end of our time? As her train of thoughts slowly passed by, she suddenly realized that there is a shadow towering over her. She peeked up, squinting her eyes due to the intensity of the sun's rays. Her expression turning blank as she peered up at the figure.

"Hi," Josh greeted with a faint smile, "can I sit beside you?" he asked hopefully

"Why?" Ammie asked averting her gaze, staring ahead at the only tree in the middle of the lawn. The tree looks and sound like a weeping willow, but the groundsmen all agreed it wasn't, so she just referred to it as 'the weeping confusion'.

"I'd like to talk to you...please?"

"Okay"

Josh sat down beside Ammie keeping enough space between them. "I'm really sorry for my incessant behaviour lately. I didn't mean to stalk you or force my friendship on you. I know it must've come off as off-putting and distasteful and that's really not who I am. I guess I just wanted to be your friend so badly I forgot how to behave. And dang that sounded so much better in my head. Anyways from now on I'll respect your space and stop following you around and I do hope if not me that you go off to college and give people a chance instead of pushing everyone away and though there are very terrible people out there with less than good intentions, not all persons are the same and you will not know who is who but that's life, that is one of the few mysteries it offers and we'll get hurt, we will all always get hurt for trusting or caring about the wrong persons. But that's how we learn Ammie. I know, who the hell do I think I am trying to lecture you about life huh? But just as you say I don't know you, likewise you don't know me, and we all have our demons tormenting us, but we can't make it through life without making mistakes and learning from them and just hope that things work out because in all honesty, life...can be pretty dismal at times," Josh finished staring at the side of Ammie's face and the silence settled in. After a while Josh decided to leave since it seemed as if Ammie was not going to say anything. He stood up, smoothed his jeans and turned to leave.

"Josh, wait," Ammie perked up, with outstretched arm and a hint of a smile she asked, "friends?"

"Friends," Josh confirmed with a grin, shook her hand and left. Ammie watched his retreating body as her smile became more real, she touched her face as if to check its authenticity and slumped back down on the bench.