The Difference Between You and Me

Chapter 29

Ammie lazily scrolled through her Instagram as she laid up in her apartment room alone. It was a weekend and after much persuasion Jade had agreed to do the grocery shopping this time around. She began to question why people felt the need to post every aspect of their lives on social media, it's as if no part of their life is private, it's all out there for the world to see and scrutinize. Suddenly a post by Josh popped up in her feed. It's been a year and six months since Ammie and Josh have been dating, they have had their fair share of fights like any other couple but since Ammie and Jade moved to New York and Josh stayed in Washington as he had received a fully funded scholarship to George Washington University where both his were senior lecturers, he seems to be struggling to maintain the relationship, them being miles apart and all. Ammie had always thought love took sacrifice, sacrifices that you have to be prepared to make for another person. But she wasn't sure whether love was an ingredient in their relationship just yet, it may be fine for that quick falling in love cliché in fiction but real life was very different and she was definitely not ready to jump the gun and get lost in fantasy. She has however been completely loyal to him despite being so far apart and still cared for him deeply as she did two years ago. Josh didn't appear to share the same sentiments she thought to herself as she stared at the post.

It was a picture of a gorgeous dark-haired girl, who is this? A question that kept replaying in her head over and over but also a question she couldn't even attempt to answer. Ammie scrolled further down to see his caption as she took a sip of her lemon water. The words I miss you Liz along with a heart was written under the post. As if on cue Ammie spit out the water, her eyes growing wider as the water sprayed across her phone screen. She quickly wiped the contents in her blouse and proceeded to the comments.

Wow man, she is hot

You two are meant for each other

Growing numb with each passing second, Ammie threw the phone across the room, luckily it landed on the beanbag she took with her to New York, but it did hit the wall pretty hard and she didn't seem to care one bit. Getting out of the bed, Ammie went to the kitchen and grabbed the last tub of cookie dough ice cream and a long wooden spoon. She dug into the tub and spooned out a large amount, then proceeded to skip through the channels for something good to watch. Crying was not an option at this point, besides there were other ways to blow some steam off and this was just the beginning.

Halfway into a lifetime movie, she heard her phone ringing from its place on the bedroom floor. Ammie placed the tub of half-eaten ice-cream on the small table to go see who was disturbing her pity session. But by the time she reached the phone, the ringing had stopped. Ammie checked to see who the missed call was from and upon seeing the I.D. simply threw the phone back on the floor and left the room. The phone started ringing again but Ammie turned up the television volume and spooned out another mouthful.

I've been sitting in the dark, feeling lonely but I'm never alone. Shadows clawing at my chest, searching for my heart. They don't know it's already ripped up, torn up, shattered into pieces. They're twisting, swirling, chasing down the shards. Good luck to them if they can find it. And if they do and want to take it, I really don't mind.

---

Ammie must've fallen asleep because the next thing she knew, someone was shaking her vigorously.

"...up Ammie, Ammie wake up!"

"Huh?" Ammie asked wearily adjusting her eyes to the brightness of the room.

"Dude, are you okay?" Jade asked with a worried expression painted across her face

"Yeah, are you back already?" Sitting up straight and rubbing her eyes.

Jade watched her actions, remembering that when she came home the apartment was in complete darkness, the drapes were drawn, and the lights were off. "Yeah, the bags are in the kitchen. Come help me unpack them," they both walked to the kitchen, Jade in front and Ammie lagging behind.

"By the way, Josh called me. He said he's been trying to call you, but you are not picking up," Jade spoke up.

Remembering what she had seen on Instagram earlier, Ammie's anger surfaced, and she immediately began to rummage through the grocery bags. Finding a huge bag of Ruffles, she ripped it open and gobbed down a handful of chips.

"Okay, okay, what happened while I was away?" Jade asked placing the jar of peanut butter, she had just removed from one of the bags on the counter.

"Ammie? Ammie?"

"Huh?"

"What is going?" Jade asked again

"What are you talking about?" Ammie asked pretending to be confused with her mouth filled with chips

"Really, are you going to lie right now? I came here to a completely dark house, you ate an entire tub of ice cream with a freaking wooden spoon while watching lifetime for crying out loud, I mean who does that? And now you are literally attacking that bag of chips after I mentioned Josh, so cut the crap and tell me what's going on."

"I like lifetime," Ammie shrugged with a filled mouth. Jade grabbed the bag of chips and held it away from Ammie, "speak...now", she demanded. Ammie heaved a sigh, knowing full well that Jade was on to her.

"Okay, I'll tell you, but first can I have my chips back," Jade hesitated

Please?" Ammie pleaded and Jade eventually surrendered.

"I went on Instagram because I was bored while you were away. Then I came upon a post made by Josh. It was a picture of a very beautiful dark-haired girl with the caption 'I miss you Liz' and a heart. I was curious among other things, so I went to the comments section.

"What did the comments say?" Jade asked cautiously, seeming afraid to hear the answer. So Ammie told her what she had seen. And by this time, all the blood had rushed to Jade's face, her lips were pursed in a thin line and her fists clenched. But Ammie didn't notice her change in aura because she wasn't looking at her.

"So, yup, that's what happened," Ammie finished nonchalantly emptying the remaining crumbs of chips into her mouth. "Come on, let's finish unpacking," Ammie said turning around to face Jade and proceeded to put away the rest of the groceries.

"Jade?"

"Hmm?"

"Come on," Ammie repeated gesturing to the bags of food on the counter and Jade unclenched her fists and relaxed her face. She knew Ammie was trying to forget about it so as to not make herself any more sad than she already was inside, so she decided to drop it. Because in life somethings are better said and left inside your head.