Again

Chapter 15

Shailene
Theo. Kissed. Me. Theodore James freaking kissed me. Theo and I are on his way to his house. His house! Maybe he's finally warming up to me. We pull into his drive way and park. He turns to me and smiles. I grin. We walk into the house and sit down in the entertainment room. I don't see Ruth anywhere. Theo scrolls through the channels until he finds a movie. I hate Valentines day. One of my favourite movies.
"So-" I settle into the couch. "-where's Ruth?"
Theo grimaces. "She's mad at me. I said something I didn't mean, she got angry, the usual." He shrugs.
"So she always does that? Never even let's you try to correct yourself? What a-" I close my mouth immediately. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that." He shakes his head and smiles. "It's alright. Your right. Women aren't always right, you know. Even Ruth," My jaw drops.
"Excuse you-" I punch him, hard, on the arm. "Women are one hundred percent always right," he chuckles and rubs his arm. Before I realize what's happening, tears are running down my cheeks. Theo notices and touches my arm. I jerk my arm away and stand up. "Just don't. Don't touch me." I wipe at my tears, but they keep streaming from my eyes. "Shai, I'm sorry. What's wrong? What's happening?" I spin around and glare at him. "How can I tell you what's wrong, if I don't even know!?" I shout. Theo takes a step back. I cross my arms and wipe my face viscously. Stop crying! I scream to myself.
"Shai..." He says it so softly, I almost don't hear him. He wraps his arms around me and squeezes. I lean into him and take a deep breath.
"I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me." I say. But I don't mean it. I know exactly what's wrong. Theo and I used to act just like that when we were...in like?
"It's alright, let's just watch the movie, okay?" I nod and he pulls me over to the couch. He balances the popcorn bowl on his knee and pulls me to him. About a million questions are flying through my head right now. Like, what if Ruth come home? Will she slap me? Will she slap Theo? Is there even anything to be slapped over? Ugh, I feel like how I felt before Theo and I revealed our feelings. Except, this time I know he has none for me. And maybe he never will.
----
The next morning, I get up and make a smoothie. I then go for a run to clear my head. I also struck a few poses for the paparazzi. They loved it. When I get back, Theo's car is in my driveway. He's pacing in front of my door. I walk up to him and wave.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" I ask grabbing the keys from my pocket and unlocking the door. I invite him in and we sit down at the kitchen table. He taps his fingers on the table and takes uneven breaths. I touch his hand to stop the tapping.
"Theo, what's wrong?" I ask. He looks at me and sighs.
"I remember something." His words hang in the air.
"What? What do you remember?" I ask quietly. He takes a deep breath.
"Unfortunately, I don't remember anything about you still-" my heart sinks. "-but, I remember what that bitch did to me. So I broke up with her." Don't smile. Don't smile. Don't dance. Stay calm. I take his hand and squeeze. "That's good, Theo. I'm glad you know what she did to you." I get up and make some coffee. With my back turned, I allow the smile on my face. But when I turn back around, I am neutral. I set Theo's coffee on the counter and he smiles at me. He still looks nervous.
"Theo, is something wrong? Why do you look so scared?" His eyes dart to mine.
"Shai..." He runs a hand through his hair. "I'm nervous about the movie. What if I'm terrible? I don't remember anything! And we start shooting in the next few weeks." He starts to tap again. "Theo it's going to be okay. Your an amazing actor. And don't worry about our chemistry, that kiss yesterday clearly proved we still go it," I laugh. Theo's eye nearly bug out if his head. He coughs and try's not to blush.
"Anyway, what are you doing today?" He asks, taking a sip from his coffee.
"I dunno, lounging, maybe a little sleeping." I shrug. Why, Theo? What do you wanna do?
"Um, well. Ruth is packing up her stuff from my place...so..." He looks away.
"Ugh, Theo. Please finish your sentences." I scold. He laughs and turns back to me.
"I was just wondering, could we hang out? Just til Ruth gets out." He coughs.
"I don't know." I sing-song. Theo eyes bulge. I laugh.
"Yes, of course we can hang out, you dork." He breathes a sigh of relief.
"Good." The rest of the afternoon, and into the evening we watch movie marathons, eat junk food (Theos idea. Not mine.) and just hang. And before we know it, it's after 1:00am.
Theo stretches out on the couch and groans. "Man, I'm tired." He yawns. I pick at the remaining nail polish on my nails. "You can crash here, if you want." I say it as nonchalantly as possible. Because my insides have turned to jello at the thought of me and Theo staying in the same house.
"You wouldn't mind? I mean we barely know each other..." My eyes snap to his.
"Theo, I know you. I used to love you-" Lie. You still love him, you idiot. "-I don't mind. I know your not a serial killer." I joke. He laughs and agrees. I get him some blankets and a pillow. We say goodnight and I head to my room. I change into underwear and a t-shirt and slip underneath the covers. And then, I let myself cry.