Yizhan/Wangxian Oneshots

exhausted (wangxian)

Lan Zhan stood with his legs burning. His hands shaking and his lips trembling, his world becoming a blur of mixed colors and a painful ringing noise in his ears. His chest caving in, stomach becoming a tight rope slowly knotting itself. His fingers painted with blood from playing inquiry for hours and hours, running to every single place of memory and nostalgia.

The bottle in his mind, keeping away any sort of emotion. A single image in his head of the almost-preventable moment. The blame.

His last place of hope. The Jingshi. Walking inside with his aching feet, he fell and crawled to the table for his guqin. Although his fingers were burning, he still played the song. His weeks of not sleeping, his weak body. He pleaded through his mind, that he could somehow connect with the very soul he felt so much guilt towards. Almost ending the song, his tears starting to fall. His last hope had disappeared. Fading into the darkness, his guqin's strings fell dormant once again.

He stood up, his eyes lacking even less emotion than before. Standing in the middle of the room, blood slowly fell. His hands were numb and he couldn't feel his body.

"Wangji?" Looking up, his brother stood in front of him. He hadn't even noticed his footsteps. 

Wangji's face suddenly let loose. His cold facial expression turned pitiful and broken. Xichen's eyes went wide at the sight of him. 

The boy gripped his heart, groaning in the pain. He fell to the ground.

"Wangji!" Xichen yelled, catching his brother and sitting on the floor with him. 

Lan Zhan sobbed, his hands clutching the clothes on his brother. His wails were so painful that Xichen had to close his eyes. At this point, disciples had gathered around to see what the fuss was. But, they hadn't expected to see Wangji like that. He hit his head against his brother's chest over and over again. 

Clan leaders stood right outside the door, watching the scene with pure terror. They knew. They knew how broken he was over him. They knew he wanted him back.

Jiang Wanyin stood there in shock. He had never seen Lan Wangji crying, let alone crying like this. 

Lan Zhan spoke with a painful, bawling voice, "I can't reach him... I can't reach him..."

Xichen's eyes shut tighter. His brother was in so much sorrow, and there was no way to help him. Absolutely no way. 

Despite all the clan leaders gathering to celebrate his death, Cloud Recesses wouldn't celebrate it. All of the place knew how close Lan Zhan and him were. When the clan leaders came to celebrate, Cloud Recesses let them in, but would not allow them to speak of him. They didn't expect to see a broken-down Lan Wangji that day.

Jiang Wanyin couldn't process the sight of the boy, wondering how a stoic, stone-faced person like him, could be so weak the next second.

And he was so weak because of him.

Wei Wuxian.

A/N:    T H I S    H U R T    M E    P H Y S I C A L L Y