Hate Me Closer (Phan)

Chapter Twelve

Dan found himself walking around the block every other afternoon during the holiday. He was used to being outside every day with school, especially when his breaks were spent on the blanket of grass across campus while it was summer. He would leave after lunch, walking through a few streets until he came to a playground, where he'd sit on the swing for a while with the thoughts in his brain.

The playground was small, with two swings, a cheap excuse of monkey bars, and a roundabout. But, for Dan, who didn't particularly want to find himself surrounded by children there to play, it was the perfect space to escape to. Even if a child was to come by, there wasn't much to do, so they wouldn't stay for long.

The estate his grandma lived in was primarily bungalows and easy-access houses, very clearly focused on inhabiting the elderly and those who struggled to get around. There were stone ramps up to most doors, and the houses were set quite low. He guessed that's why the parks weren't entirely adequate, because there weren't many children around.

He sat swinging his legs back and forth, rocking on the soles of his feet to build a bit of momentum before he took them away entirely, letting the childhood joy of the rush of air against his ears slip a smile onto his lips.

There was a sea of daisies across the park's grass, and the field was well-kept. There were a few football posts, although they didn't look overly used, even in the middle of summer. He saw an ice-cream van in the distance with an elderly couple paying their money over to the woman behind the screen. He'd become quite fond of his little hideaway.

He found himself staring at the tops of the trees, watching the birds fly between the branches, and the occasional squirrel running across the bark. He stayed for about half an hour, as he always does, and then jumped off to potter his way back home.

He stopped at the end of the stretch, looking at the figure sitting on a bench, whose looks caught his attention. Dan stared at the boy for a moment, who wore his hair much like Dan's, but dyed black and his fringe fell over the other eye. His skin was much paler, and he'd engulfed himself in an oversized hoodie over a pair of black skinny jeans. The boy noticed Dan, giving him a small wave.

It was the wave that clicked who it was into Dan's head, and between the lack of school uniform and the change in hair colour, he'd not recognised him instantly. But, it was the awkward gesture and the lopsided smile that made the younger boy realise it was Phil Lester, the very boy he'd spent the year tormenting mildly.

Dan didn't wave back, instead he scoffed, shaking his head at his classmate and briskly pacing off down the path as he wondered what the other boy was doing in his park. He wanted to ask, but he'd left it too long to befriend him now.

He made his way back through the winding streets, opening the door to his grandma offering him a biscuit. He took it, wandering to the landline phone where he dialled Chris. As the phone rang, Dan's grandma stood in the doorway, muttering, "I shall get you a bloody phone of your own so you stop using mine." she wore a smile, however, and continued friendily, "Well, that was a joke, but those mobile telephones exist these days, don't they?"

"I'll buy myself one, grandma." Dan laughed, hearing Chris' mum down the line, "Hey there!"

"Ah, I'll pass you to Chris now, Dan."

"Thank you!" he brightly spoke, waiting for his friend to answer.

"Oh, hey, Dan!" Chris greeted his best friend.

"Hi! So, you won't guess who I saw at my local park today."

"Who?"

"Phil." Dan chuckled.

"Lester?"

"Yeah!"

"That's weird. Oh, also, I got a mobile, remind me to give you my number." Chris noted.

"Oh, that's cool! I'm looking at getting one, too. What did you get?"

"Nokia." Chris stated, "So, what do you think Phil was doing there?"

"I don't know, he was kind of just sat on a bench."

"Alone?"

"Yep."

"How weird. And he's not been there before?"

"Not as far as I'm aware."

"You really are obsessed with him, Dan." Chris teased.

"Shut up!" Dan whined, "I'm not, this isn't my fault."

"Calm your tits." Chris laughed, "I was only joking."

"You better have been, I hate that kid."

"I still don't get why." Chris pointed out.

"He's just annoying." Dan shrugged, "How was your weekend?"

"Yeah, good. Sat around as always."

They continued to catch up as they did every other week, until Dan's grandma forced him off the phone so she could dial her own friend. He said goodbye to his buddy and passed her the telephone, walking back to his bedroom.

He sat around for a moment, looking around his room before deciding he was going to set up a game on his PlayStation in the living room, while his grandma would be distracted on the phone for a few hours. He sat on the sofa, his back sunken into the cushions and his feet up on the coffee table.

About an hour later, his grandma came in demanding his feet down and for him to sit with a straight back. They laughed together at her complaints, until she joyfully chuckled, "It doesn't matter, anyway, I want you to come and bake a Victoria Sponge with me."

"How come?" the boy asked, turning his console off.

"I'm seeing my friend tomorrow and I'm no good at reading the scales anymore."

He walked her into the kitchen when he took out the manual scales, looking amusedly up at her as he chuckled, "You do know you can buy digital ones that you'd be able to read?"

"Oh, I don't need those when I have you."

"I go to boarding school!" Dan laughed.

"Well then, guess I'll email you photos as I bake." she mumbled, still uncomfortable with her grandson sleeping at school, "You do enjoy Auburn, don't you?"

"Yeah," he nodded, "I really do. I mean, not the education, but I love the boarding side." he shrugged, watching the weights as his grandma poured the flour through a sieve.

"Well, if you ever don't..."

"Grandma." he pushed, "I know, you tell me this all the time." he looked up, "Did you ever contact your friend about college in America?"

"Right!" she exclaimed, "I did that last weekend, I still need to get him your email, could you write it down for me at some point and stick it to the fridge."

"Sure." Dan nodded, a large smile on his face.

She sighed, "Oh, Dan. I don't want to get your hopes up."

"Yeah, yeah. Expect the worst and whatever good happens will seem incredible, I know-"

"I'm not saying that-"

"You are." he laughed, "If I get upset over it, I get upset over it. It's better to hope than not dream at all."

"You are a wise one, Dan." she respectfully muttered, "I say that, but you're pouring flour down your jeans."

"Shit." he cursed, wiping his hands down the black denim.

She flicked him on the back of the head, "None of that, thank you very much. That's boarding school for you."

"Please," Dan rolled his eyes, "the upper years get up to much worse."