Hate Me Closer (Phan)

Chapter Twenty

No matter what Katherine did to try and fix the two boys' interactions with each other after dinner on the first night, it didn't work. She ended up letting Dan eat after them because otherwise, he didn't eat at all. She tried asking her son what Dan meant when he said the other boys were "dicks" to him, but Phil never gave a solid answer. He didn't want to cause trouble, so he didn't speak up.

Dan never got his tour around the house, instead he learnt where the rooms were by wandering the house when he got bored. The TV that was supposed to be there was refixed into the wall, and he wired his PlayStation up to it so he could waste away the hours of the day. That was, of course, if he wasn't at the piano.

After dinner on the first night, he hastily made his way into the conservatory where the instrument was positioned. He ran his fingers over the keys, and although they'd untuned themselves slightly due to the journey, they didn't sound too bad. He played the songs he had stapled into his mind through once, stopping at the end of the eighth song and turning around on the stool.

Katherine stood there, a smile on her face as she nodded, "Sounds amazing, Dan. Do you have a grade?"

"No." he replied honestly, "Self-taught after, well...I moved in with Grandma."

Kath nodded, turning away again and leaving the newest addition to her household in peace.

And now, six nights later, he was sat back at the very stool, losing his mind over a line of sheet music he couldn't coordinate his two hands to play. He slammed the notes before closing the lid, letting his forehead fall onto the wood as he heard Phil greet his mother in the living room next door to him.

Phil had sat down, tucking his knees up to his chest on the sofa and letting the soft breaths of air from his nostrils fall onto his jeans, "I'm sorry." he mumbled.

"For what, Philly?" Kath asked, lifting her arm up to take her son in an embrace.

"For not trying. I wanted this to work for him, for us, but he's so...difficult." Phil admitted, feeling awful for talking bad about another breathing person.

"You never told me what Dan meant when he said other students gave you trouble." she pointed out, wanting a clear answer from her son finally.

"Fine." he gave in, "I get bullied at school. It's nothing I can't deal with."

"Is this why you don't like Dan? Does he bully you?" his mother was one of the most endearing people he knew.

"No!" he defended, "Well, not anymore. Last year he was the issue, but he was the only issue. This year the other kids have joined in, but he seems to have swapped round and at least stops them when they call me slurs." Phil shrugged, taking his feet off the cushions. He took a moment before mumbling, "I guess since his grandma died he's just...stopped caring. Although, he shouldn't have been how he was with me last year."

"Phil?" his mum asked, "Do you know Dan's story?"

He nodded, "His grandma died this term and he had no one else to go to for the holidays, so the school put him in the guardian program."

"No." Katherine shook her head, "Well...not quite. His parents died in a car crash December last year. He was the only one to survive. He moved in with his grandma, who then died this term. He has no family left."

"Oh," Phil muttered, his lips agape and heart twisting with sympathy.

"I can't believe you didn't know that." Kath sighed, "You're in his class."

"I don't think anyone knows that." Phil accurately assumed, "His friend, Chris, maybe."

"You've mentioned Chris a lot recently, who is he?" Kath asked.

"Dan's best friend and a kid in my class and he's done a few plays with me the last couple of years. He's...friends with PJ too, now." Phil had been friends with PJ since Year Four in their lower school, and he was eternally grateful for it, otherwise he'd be truly lost in the sea of arrogant teenage boys. Phil looked up at his mum, speaking softly as he admitted, "I didn't say anything about Dan because a kid like him isn't how he is for no reason. It doesn't take a genius to know he's hurting, and it makes sense now." he looked at the stairs, thinking Dan was in his room and worried he'd come down, "I didn't want to cause him more problems when he was likely on the brink of being expelled. Last year he just mocked me, maybe ram into me a few times, but nothing that upset me. So, it didn't make sense to speak up."

Kath looked away from Phil, crossing her arms and legs as she shook her head, "I'm going to make that boy happy if it kills me." she admitted, "The school wanted him with us for a reason, and I imagine that's because of the kid we took in from Martyn's year who also lost his parents, but I feel as though there's more to it than that."

"I know what you mean." Phil quietly agreed, "I've just not known where to start."

"Just...be there for him." Kath suggested, "If he wants to talk, let him. Try and get him involved in your activities and accept you'll probably be shut off. We'll go on a walk later, us three, it'll be good for him especially to get out."

There was a long pause of silence before Phil randomly asked, "How do you know if someone's gay?"

His mother looked at him, a stern expression but one of care, "I guess they've got to tell you. There's stereotypes, but they might not necessarily be true. Why are you asking?"

"I think PJ might be." he shrugged, standing up and fetching his drink from the other side of the room, "I think him and Chris have something going on."

"You should make the call on what to do there, Phil. If you think he'll find it invasive, wait for him to tell you, otherwise just drop a question because he might be waiting for you to address it first." she smiled, standing up as well, stating, "I need to get the dishes out of the dishwasher."

"Okay." Phil nodded, staring through the window into their back garden. He crossed his arms, holding his glass to his chest as he walked it up the stairs.