The Assassin [Hwang Hyunjin]

Chapter.3

Chapter.3

5 years later

______________________________________

I watched as the rain drops trickled down the window sill. Annie sat beside me, wiping the tears from my face as I thought about my wedding tomorrow.

"I wish there was something I could do" Annie said, she stopped dabbing my face and stared at me for a few moments. "But you have held this wedding off for way to long" she said before beginning to dab my face again.

"I am not ready to marry yet, isn't that my own choice Annie?" I asked her as tears fell from eyes. Annie didn't say anything, she stayed silent, watching me closely while clutching the rag that she was using to dry my face with. "Mother and Father did not have a deadline for their marriage, I don't see why I can't have the same for myself" I said.

Annie looked down and sighed, she grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly. "It's alright, just breathe Minyoung" She told me.

"No it is not alright!" I stood up from my book nook and stormed over to my bedroom door. I began to pace back and forth thinking about having to spend the rest of my life with prince Harold. I do not to be with him nor do I want to bare his children, I believe being with him will push me to my limits and will be the most miserable marriage ever.

"There is no love behind his eyes Annie" I told her.

"Everytime I look at him, I just see a creep wanting me to drop my knickers" I told her. Annie pursed her lips and furrowed her eyes. "I don't think I've ever seen him that way, are you sure you're feeling alright Minyoung?" She asked me.

"Get out" I told her.

Annie was quiet for a few moments, she sighed before standing up. I avoided meeting her eyes as she passed me on her way out the door. "Goodnight Minyoung" she told me before closing the door behind her.

I began to hyperventilate, standing in my room, I am letting my fears get the best of me. I realized that I needed some air so I approached my balcony, and opened the doors quite roughly. I took a deep breath, cherishing the smell of the midnight air. The rain had just stopped a few minutes ago.

As I stood there gripping to the railing for dear life, trying to keep myself from letting out the animalistic scream, I felt my chest begin to constrict. I fell to my knees, squeezing the bars of the railing until my knuckles turned white.

"Why" I sobbed, I shook, crying with my face pressed against the bars, a sharp intake of breath followed after. All of my past traumas and all of my current traumas began to surface and hit me all at once. "Why!" I screamed as I shook the bars in front of me.

I thought my mother would be on my side but all she cares about is having grandchildren so we can keep the family bloodline going. My father has never listened to me, never understood and never given me the love and protection that he should have.

I've had no one to look up to but myself. The maids and everyone tending to the castle have witnessed the abuse and neglect that I have endured. They have done nothing, they can't do anything, otherwise they would lose their jobs and they wouldn't be able to provide for their families.

Instead of fixing the generational trauma, my father projected it onto me and now I must suffer with him.

Everyday I feel like I'm drowning in a river of my sorrows. And I feel so trapped as I keep giving up the opportunities to leave this place. The river grows as I continue to stay here.

I don't want to be here, I don't want to live in this horrible world anymore.

Maybe all my sorrows could be solved?

I was told when you die, there is no pain, no tears, no anger and no sorrows... you are welcomed by your loved ones that have died before you and you are protected from all of the evil that you had once lived.

Sitting there on the balcony with tears rolling down my reddened cheeks. I thought to myself if living was really worth it, if I had a purpose in this world.

I struggled to stand up, the bars shook as I held onto them for support. Once I was up on my feet, I climbed up onto the railing, holding onto the column so I wouldn't fall.

The wind roared, it dried my tears and blew fresh air into my lungs. Is it a sign? Is what I'm doing right? I do not believe that what I am doing is right, it is a selfish act but if it rids me of my trauma and my sorrows, I will take the risk.

I took a deep breath in and looked down at the courtyard below.

"Forgive me, lord"

As I was about to jump, I heard a voice behind me.

"Wait"

I gasped and slipped off of the railing, I began to fall to my death. The cold ground awaited for my arrival.

A man cloaked in black jumped from the balcony after me. He crashed into me, somehow managing to grab ahold of me. As we were falling, he caught himself on one of the window sills, saving our lives.

I went to look up at him but could not see his face due to the hood of his cloak. He looked at me "I'm sorry" he covered my face with a damp cloth, I started to scream but as I inhaled the smell of the damp cloth, I immediately passed put

Darkness surrounded me but I was not dead, I was alive and now I am being taken away by an unknown man dressed in black.

What have I done?