You will never be a real Koji

COTE Reacts Part 3 (R18)

A/N: I deleted 'COTE Reacts PARODY' because it is extremely cringy and a lot of bad writing. Also, please do not attempt to do it IRL. (WARNING Violence) 

All 2nd year students were this time, summoned in a ring-shaped theatre. Everyone was seated at the 2nd floor, while the 1st floor was empty. The stage was occupied by a bespectacled redhead man with funky attire beside a mechanical water barrel. There was a door leading to probably backstage but with a giant strip of grey ribbon in front of the door. The man seemed to be brewing water as he held a digital infrared device to sense the water temperature. There were extra chairs on one side of the stage, facing the audience the reverse direction. Hashimoto was seating in one of them like he was in the waiting queue.

"Where are we? Again?"

"We're in a different place!"

"What's this about?"

Endless comments, all cringy by virtue of starting with 'W' or 'H' (no offense to the people who's initials contains a W or H) resonated throughout the hall, seemingly annoying the bespectacled man.

"No need to be so chaotic everyone, I summoned you here because the gingerbread man was carelessly strolling around and I managed to cut him and eat him for dinner last night."

"How could ya? Cruelty bro!"

"So heartless!"

"He brought drinks for us HOW THE FUCK could you?!"

"I'm not finished, and that's no more important than what I'm gonna show you. It's another badly written story by a writer under the label 'mobfag'. Be lucky he did not put the cover of a plain white background with a color pencil on it, 'cos heck that kind of theme could sell well, but it certainly dosen't fit the content. I'm giving too much spoilers or my opinion, so it's about to start now."

Two idiot students were at some corner of the school arguing. It was a rather shady place, but not so since an elevator was nearby. Apparently Shinohara was sitting down with her feet getting stomped by Ike's and he was kneeling to level her. Luckily it had yet escalated into getting physical.

"It's them again..."

"Let me go! You seriously are the worst, our class lost again because of you! I hope you were in Class A all along so at that time we could defeat Class A during the final exam last year, plus I don't need to get to meet such a cheesebrain like you in the first place!"

"Fufufu. Seriously Class D wouldn't have enough points to let alone save Yamauchi-kun and now someone wants to transfer to our side."

"Kukuku you try to imagine the life of your classmates having to deal with a Class D, in other words defective, transfer student, kukuku."

"Then you pay 20 million for me to leave!"

"I bet this is even realistic."

"From Class D? The chances of winning a lottery is still higher."

"Good, our class dosen't need such a lecher like you! Stop getting so distracted over some girl from another class!"

"How're we gonna survive in deserted islands without our Ike here?"

"Right."

"We'd probably fail and lose class points if it wasn't for Kanji's camping experience!!!"

"Is this part of Shinohara-san's jealousy?"

"I think so, Karuizawa-san."

"I'm not jealous! He's just so idiotic!"

"But I turned them down for you! N-now see, I just wanted to f-"