A Kiss and I Will Surrender

32

I dialed Mikey's number, he would probably be with Gerard. That is, if they hadn't gone to the airport yet.

"Hey Frank..." He sounded sympathetic.

"Hi Mikey, is um.. is Gerard there?"

"I just dropped him and Jack off at the airport," He let out an exhausted sigh, "We need to uh, talk about that actually... You and him..." My breath caught in my throat and I blinked rapidly.

"Wh... what?"

"I'll be at your place soon," He hung up the phone at that. I pulled my shoes on and said goodbye to Pete who gratefully collapsed back into his bed, almost immediately falling asleep.

Panic set in, what if he was upset? I knew he was bound to find out someday, but now that it was reality, I was more worried than ever about what he would think.

--

"Start at the beginning," We were sat across from each other at the kitchen table, I'd gotten home just a few minutes before he pulled up.

"Well..." I told him everything, from the first kiss to the drunken phone call, and he listened to all of it. He didn't give me any strange looks or react negatively to anything I said, he just listened. He was really good at listening when you needed him to.

"Wow," He looked down at his lap, "I'm sorry."

I furrowed my brow, "For what?"

"For trying to keep you two apart," His eyes met mine and they were glistening, "You clearly liked him from the start, I shouldn't have tried to force you to stop. And it's not like you could control whether or not you liked him."

"It's okay," I murmured.

"No, it's not," He shook his head, "I'm part of the reason why you guys aren't together."

"No... We aren't together because he doesn't like me anymore, and.. and I don't like him," I said, even though it was the biggest lie I had ever told.

"It's not really my place to say anything," He scoffed, "But he definitely doesn't not like you," Mikey said, his mouth twitching into a smile.

"It doesn't matter, he's gone now. I'll get over him... someday."

"Are you sure? I can call him and ask him to come back," I shook my head. I needed to push him as far away as I could, a huge step in that direction was not contacting him ever again. I needed to get over him.

--

Gerard's POV:

I called Frank the night we got back, but once again I was met with his voice mail message. I left him a message, hoping he would call back, and even texted him to try and see if he was okay. I apologized for not saying goodbye and for calling him the night prior. I just wanted to hear his voice.

My phone chimed around 11:30pm and I snatched it up as fast as I could. I eagerly unlocked the phone and saw that Frank had texted me. My glee was soon replaced by anguish as I read what he had written:

Please don't call me again -frnk

So this was goodbye. Suddenly the ache in my heart; the longing for him by my side caught fire. The flames spread through me as if my arms had been dry branches in a forest, just waiting to be ignited. I dropped my phone out of my hand and on the floor. I curled up into a ball and sobbed, shaking and crying over the boy I could never have. If I had expected this, why was it still such a shock? Why did it hurt so much even after coming to terms with the fact that we were never meant to be? It was because no matter what I still loved him.