The day I wrote a song about you

Chapter 33: Waves

I locked myself in the bathroom. Yes, I had decided to do it. I had my phone, I had my earphones and I had my fingers.

My brothers weren't home, grandpa was downstairs and mom was asleep.

That was weird. My house was never this peaceful. But I had to take advantage of it.

I sat on the toilet and searched the kind of video I was looking for. I didn't know there were so many. I scrolled through some of them and finally landed on one that had a good lightning. I needed to really see what was going on. Just with the thumbnails I was getting a tickling sensation down there.

It began. At first I was horrified, I didn't know it looked like that down there. Then I got curious, and then I got hot. When I was halfway through the second video, I concluded three things: there was this little button that I guessed was what was called clitoris, and rubbing it made you feel good. The second thing I learned was that the girls weren't huge fans of introducing things inside of them, which I was thankful for, since I was scared to do it. The third thing, it was gonna get wet.

When I lost my virginity I was dry, that I remembered very well.

I decided it was time for me to try out and lowered down my hand inside my pants and underwear. I was already a little wet, so I guessed that was a good sign. I felt weird and ticklish and embarrassed, but after a moment of rubbing my clit, it started to feel really good.

By that time, the phone was long forgotten on the sink, and I was just alone with my thoughts. I didn't want to but for some reason, I was thinking of a particular pair of hands on my body. He wasn't even kissing me, he just looked at me with those intense blue eyes that made me melt. I started to feel hotter, a wave of pleasure coming up my lower stomach, as if something was about to explode.

I felt like... I needed to pee?

I stopped. I didn't want to pee.

I was sweating, I was red and I was breathing heavily. I looked at myself in the mirror as I washed my hands. I blushed even harder. I was a little embarrassed. But it did feel good. I was surely doing that again.

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Weeks had passed, I had a little bit more of practice, maybe three or four times, but each time, I got this sensation of pressure down there. As if I really wanted to pee. Maybe I needed to stop way before that.

I didn't know, but I liked the feeling.

Nico was finishing up his exhibition and with his new job, he had been really busy. I had been preparing for a competition and trained hard. I was having lots of difficulties with sleeping and I was more distracted than usual. I kept forgetting things and I wasn't doing very good at the one thing I was supposed to be great at: skating. I was really nervous and scared about the competition, I was afraid I wasn't gonna perform as well as I could.

Everyone in my family noticed, but when I said it was the meds' fault, nobody listened. Yes, they did me some good in the past, but they weren't working for me anymore.

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My blood was boiling inside my veins, smoke coming out of my nostrils. I parked and went inside my house, letting my duffle bag next to the door in a rather aggressive way.

I wasn't one to get angry-

Well, maybe I was.

But I had my reasons now.

"Hey." Brandon said from the couch. "How was it?"

"Fourth." I mumbled and walked up the stairs two at a time.