The day I wrote a song about you

Chapter 10: Tired

Physical therapy sounded like the worst when I opened my eyes on Monday morning.

I closed them again.

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I didn't have a phone now, so no one could bother me. Luca was working, so the place was all for me.

I slept. I slept like I had not done in a long time. Sleeping kept me from thinking. Sleeping felt good.

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"Dude!"

"Mhm?" I didn't even bother lifting my head.

"Nico, wake up! You've been sleeping all day?" Luca yelled once again opening my drapes. It did nothing since it was already dark.

"Seems like I did." I replied. He then proceeded to turn on the lights. "Mon dieu, turn that off or I swear I'll kill you." I grunted.

"I bought you something. Wanna see it?" He asked excitedly. I heard a light thump in my desk right after. I covered my eyes with my hands but Luca sat down beside me in the bed and grabbed them. "Riley said you didn't go to your appointment. You've really been sleeping all day?" Luca asked with a frown.

I nodded slowly, my eyes adjusting to the light.

"Are you okay?" He asked with a worried expression.

"Yes, I just didn't feel like going. It fucking hurts and now that I'm all bruised it'll probably hurt even more." I bit my lips in frustration, running a hand along my curls. I woke up in a really shitty mood, and the fact that he had just woken me up not exactly in the sweetest way, didn't help.

"I thought you went to physical therapy to relieve the pain. To get better." He said softly.

"Well, I'm not getting any better." I began frustratedly. "I've been fucking limping since I was 23 years old and finished my last surgery and it still fucking hurts!" I snapped. Luca shut his mouth and stared at me cautiously. "I'm just tired, I'm fucking tired! I can't do this anymore. I don't want to-"

"You don't want to what?" He whispered.

"Nothing. Please, I wanna be alone." I turned around on the bed, grabbing a pillow and hid my face. When I still felt him beside me, I turned to him again and yelled. "Get out! Get the fuck out! I wanna be alone!"

Luca opened his eyes wide and got up slowly. His mouth agape. "Okay, I... I'm sorry." I would never forget the hurt in his eyes. I sighed and extended my arm towards him, but he had already turned around. Before I could apologize, or even say anything, he had already gotten out of the room.

I took one of my big pillows and pushed it against my face, uttering a half-choked cry of frustration.

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I actually thought it was later on when I woke up again, but it was just 8.30 pm. Days were just getting darker. I got up slowly, taking the time I needed so I wouldn't hurt myself.

As I walked towards the bathroom, I saw a box on my desk that wasn't there before. I approached it slowly and squinted my eyes.

It was an Apple box. An iPhone to be exact.

I frowned and thought for a moment. Luca said he had bought something for me earlier. Did he really just bought me the latest phone in the market?

I felt so incredibly bad I almost jump off the balcony. My chest hurt, my throat did too. And it wasn't because of the bruises. Luca was really trying to help me and I yelled at him. My exact words being 'get the fuck out'. Way to go, Nico. If you had doubts about being a shitty person, well now you had just confirmed them. I should've just listened to my family all these years ago, end all this and I would've saved a lot of time not only to me, but to people in my life.