Adulttrio/Feitan Short Story Collection

🚀⭐️. Dinner Date with Hisoka and Illumi

Swipe for Show Me How by Men I Trust 👆

You gripped the armrest with all your strength. Illumi drove like he was in grand theft auto.

Hisoka looked in the rear view mirror, only to see your face accepting death with closed eyes.

"You're a bit sensitive, aren't you?" Remarked Illumi with a monotone voice. "Excuse me you bald headed fat toed horse built skank???" You said between panicked breaths.

Hisoka smirked and Illumi sighed. "We're here, you can open your eyes now." You fluttered your eyelids open and looked outside your window. Bright flashing lights flooded into the car.

(Time skip to when ur inside asf)

You, Hisoka, and Illumi all sat at a small circular table.

Hisoka inspected the tasteful decor of the restaurant, while Illumi went around and wiped off everyone's fork and knives with his napkin.

The waitress stopped by and dropped off everyone's menus. "What do you want, (y/n)?" Hisoka asked, keeping his eyes fixated on the menu.

"Screw that, everyone's getting caviar." Illumi said with a completely straight face. "Wh-what." Hisoka said in shock. "My mother told me restaurants like these will always prioritize the highest paying customers. If we order the most expensive thing possible every time we go here, they will eventually submit to us. Of course you wouldn't know that Hisoka, because your mother is dead."

You and Hisoka looked at each other with blank stares. "Caviar it is I suppose." Said Hisoka in attempt to fill in the silence.

(Time skip to when u have ur food besties)

"Illumi, could you ask the waitress for more napkins? You see, I would myself, but I'm a bit shy~" Hisoka said, batting his eyes at Illumi.

Illumi looked around, searching for the waitress. Once they locked eyes, Illumi bobbed his hand up for a second and pointed at his table, signifying that he needed her assistance.

The waitress walked over. "Is there something you need, sir?" "More napkins." Said Illumi, completely monotone. "I'm sorry what was that?" The waitress leaned in a bit. "More napkins." Illumi repeated the exact same volume, not picking up on the social queue that he needed to raise his voice.

This interaction pained you, so you decided to take matters into your own hands. "Can we get more napkins, please?" Illumi and Hisoka's eyes were both on you now.

"Oh yes, of course!" She said as she pulled them out of her apron. "Here you go!" She turned and walked away. "I could have done that myself." Said Illumi. "Of course you could."