Remember My Voice (Reader X Levi)

Chapter 1 - Since It Happened

- A few months earlier - 

"Y/N hey! Over here!" You looked up from writing in your journal in the food hall to meet eyes with one of your best friends, Armin Arlert. His arm was waving around to ensure you saw him sat at the far table with your other friends: Eren and Mikasa . You smiled and quickly shut your journal. 

You made you way over to your friends, passing by all of the other tables on your way. You felt a burning stare in your back as you walked. Much like one of your other friends, Sasha, you had grown up in a family of previous hunters with hunting ancestry. The down side of your heightened instincts combined with the fact of the world you were living in, was your inability to ignore said instincts. You jerked your head around to see where the stare was coming from and you met the eyes of a fellow cadet, Jean Kirstein. You and Jean were friends, but you couldn't help but chuckle at his constant angry expression on his face as he stared you down. You knew he had a crush on you, but you decided to ignore it, You didn't want to ruin the playful flirty friendship you already had by acting on it unnecessarily. Who has time for anything like that in this life anyway. 

You gave jean a playful salute and wink, which brought him back to his senses and out of his stone faced stare he was giving you. He smirked with a slight blush to his cheeks and saluted back. You reached your friends at the table on the other side of the room and plopped yourself down, a little more aggressively than expected next to Armin who jumped slightly. "Well good morning to you too madame" Eren chuckled. "Something bothering you (Y/N)?" Mikasa looked up from her bread and butter, slightly worried about you. "Shit sorry guys" You mumbled getting your journal out to continue writing. Eren leaned forward slightly to see what you were writing that had you so frustrated. "You're trying to remember some more aren't you?" Armin smiled sadly. It had been 4 years since yours and your dear 3 friends' town, Shiganshina had been destroyed. The closest thing you had to remembering what happened were random flashbacks, sometimes dreams. Your memories from that day, and 2 years leading on from it were gone other than that. All you knew was that you completely disappeared for those 2 years, until Armin miraculously found you wandering around in the town one day.

The Doctor you visited frequently once you had been found and taken in by your friends told you it must have been PTSD, that something so traumatic must have happened to you in that time that your brain completely blocked it out. That same doctor had also suggested keeping a journal entry everyday might help you to remember. That was not exactly what you wanted to hear, but unfortunately you had to live with it. 

"I know we can't help you much with the years you went missing, but you know you can always ask us about that day, we'll tell you everything you want to know (Y/N)" Mikasa said gently placing her hand on top of yours " If we can help you piece that day the titans broke in together, then maybe that will help to give you a starting point to remember the years that followed". You gave her a weak smile and squeezed her hand back. "I know. And you guys know I will ask when I feel it's necessary, I'm just so determined to remember myself and I really do think I'm starting to!" You said, determination strong in your voice. Eren smiled sweetly at you. "So stubborn" You laughed at his remark, but it was true. You were slowly starting to be able to piece memories together. Your flashbacks combined with you constantly noting them down in your journal was beginning to clear your foggy memories.

"Well training is gonna be starting soon and I don't wanna be late, we're actually gonna be practicing our skills on dummies today!" Eren exclaimed practically jumping up and down with excitement. Mikasa rolled her eyes while you and Armin chuckled. "I'm nervous to tell you the truth" Armin said anxiously rubbing his neck. "Oh come on Armin, you're the smartest out of all of us, you've been amazing so far" Eren started to stand up and offered his hand out for all of us to give him our empty plates. "That may be the case but physically and skill wise, I'm far from you three. Especially Mikasa and (Y/N)" Armin sighed, also standing up. This was true. Armin was significantly weaker than the rest of us. Even if he was by far the smartest 18 year old boy had ever met, there was no denying you were all concerned for his safety when it came down to strength and fighting. "Hey Armin, don't even bother trying to compare yourself with these girls, no ones self esteem levels need that knock" You and Mikasa stood up and whipped around to see who was feeling the need to hype you both up so much, but your face softened to see it was just Jean. 

He was now making his way over to the table you were still sat down at with Sasha, Connie and Marco. "Anyways, out of the goodness of (Y/N)'s heart, I'm sure she would come to your rescue anytime" Jean continued while draping his arm around your shoulders and winking at you. You and Mikasa both rolled your eyes in sync. "Heh, well I suppose you could be right there" Armin quietly replied, looking down in slight embarrassment. You lightly elbowed Jean in the stomach, which earned a low chuckle from Mikasa "Knock it off will you tough guy, Armin's gonna be just fine." You laughed as Jean did a fake stomach grab in "Pain" and contorted his face to further act like you had hurt him. Sasha quickly came forward and grabbed your right hand and Mikasa left as she ran to the doors, clearly determined to leave and get her gear on, ready for training.