Remember My Voice (Reader X Levi)

Chapter 22 - The Choosing Ceremony

It was about an hour before the ceremony. 

Eventhough we hadn't officially found out who the top 10 cadets were in the class, those of us who were in the running were dropped a slight hint from Erwin.

I was one of them, so was Mikasa.

We were all sat in the food hall, some people were drunk most were just slightly tipsy and rowdy. Jean and Connie were stood up arms around eachother singing while everyone else sang along or danced and laughed. It was a pleasant atmosphere, but not one I wanted to be a part of right now. 

I quietly got up as everyone was currently distracted and took myself outside to the little yard. I looked up and could see the wall staring back at me as I took a deep breath and leaned my back against the wall. I slid down until I was sat on the floor.

This was it.

Today was the day I would decide which regiment to join.

All the training

All the sacrifice

All the bloodshed

The possibility of being able to find myself..

Today was the day I would decide if I would continue to fight on the front lines of humanity as a scout, or retreat behind the safety of the walls once again as part of the Military Police.

I sighed out loud as you sat with my back against the cold wall of the small yard that lead into the hallways of the cadet dorms, the cold wind of the early hours sharply keeping me awake.

The specific section that this small yard was in was enclosed between the other buildings of HQ, but I could still clearly see the Great Wall Maria in direct eye level. I had always known you wanted to work my hardest and use your skills to prove I was able to join the Military Police, after all, who would turn down a life of further ease just to fight those ugly bastards some more. At least, that was how you felt until me and my comrades had come up close and personal with said ugly bastards.

Eventhough I had very much proven my ability to join the Military Police, everyday brought further doubt into my mind. Maybe the Scouts would be my only strange comfort. Being able to be amongst people who fully understood the weight of watching friends die and being unable to help.

I was deep in thought when I hear the door open, and someone else come outside. I looked up to see who it was, it was Jean. 

I smiled at him and laughed slightly at his drunken stumbling state. 

"Hey big guy" I said

"Hey beautiful" He replied, slurring slightly as he plopped himself down next to me heavily. 

He sighed loudly and put his arm around my shoulders before looking me directly in the eye. I looked back into his intense stare, having a feeling I knew what was gonna happen next.

"(Y/N) I'm gonna join the scouts" He half-whispered to me. I froze in place and grabbed onto his shoulders.

"Jean you're drunk. The MP's were always your thing why would you join the scouts? Are you serious?" I was spouting out words of concern and slight irritation at his decision when before I could even draw breath he grabbed my face and passionately kissed me. 

This didn't feel like a drunk kiss. 

I could tell this was genuine.

I let myself melt into it and wrapped my arms around his neck and he wrapped his around my waist, deepening the kiss.