A girl with a dark past, she wants to keep it the past. She has a lot of trust issues but for some reason, she trust's him. Was that a mistake? Will her life crumble down completely? You'll have to read to find out ;)
****Please read at your own ris...
After we ate breakfast, Josh pulled me into his room. He shuts the door and looks at me with an evil grin. I raise my eyebrows at him and he continues to smile.
Josh: Lets go to yours!
*I look at him confused*
Me: What!?!
Josh: I want to spend tonight with you, just us. We spent time with my family last night and tomorrow we can hang out with your mom!
*I smile*
Me: Lets go then!
*He looks a little shocked*
Josh: Wow, didn't think you would budge that easily!
*I laugh and shake my head*
Me: Shut up and lets go!
*He gestures towards the door and I grab his hand. We run down the stairs and to the front door.*
Josh yells: Mom, we're going to Sam's for dinner!
Josh's Mom yells back: Ok! Be safe!
*We weren't completely lying. We are eating dinner at my place... I get pulled out of my thoughts by Josh pulling me out the front door and we practically make a bee line to the car. We get in and he drives to my house while we blast music and scream at the top of our lungs. Not to long after, we pull into my driveway. We get out and start walking to the front door, hand-in-hand, when Josh pulls back on my wrist. I look at him confused and he just smashes his lips on mine. I pull away and laugh while dragging him inside.*
Josh: Come on, I wanna see if you can draw us!
*I laugh once more and e both run upstairs and into my room like little kids. I plop down on my bed and Josh sits in my chair at my vanity. I look at him confused. He points to my sketchbook and I nod while letting out a soft chuckle. I decide to give in and draw us. It will be fun and Josh will love it. I start sketching in my notebook while Josh plays music talks to me. It was really run and I let Josh ramble as I drew. About an hour or two later, I finish drawing. He see's me put my pencil down and his face lights up.*
Josh: Did you?
*I nod and smile. He runs over to the bed and practically jumps on top of me. I shut the book and look at him.*
Me: No judging or teasing!
*He clutches a hand to his chest in a playful way.*
Josh: Aw baby, I would never!
*I playfully roll my eyes at him and show him the drawing.*
This is what it looked like:
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*He stares at it in awe.*
Josh: Holy shit Sam, this is amazing!
*I smile slightly and look down. He looks at me and shuts the book closed. He pushes it to the side on my night stand.*
Josh: Really!
*I smile, this time a full smile and kiss him. He climbs on top of me, breaking the kiss while I laugh. He then kisses me again and starts to kiss down my neck. Then there it is.
The memories.
They all came back.
*I tried to hold back the tears, I really did but I couldn't I clasped my mouth shut and began to silently cry. Josh pulls away from my neck and see's the tears in my eyes.*
Josh: Hey, hey its ok. We don't have to do anything!
*I nod*
Me: It's ok!
*I look at him hovering over me with worry on his face and I break down crying. He gets really worried but tries his best to stay clam.*
Josh: Fuck, I'm sorry baby! I didn't mean to- I-I didn't mean to pressure you or anything! I get it, your not ready and I get it!
*I nod but continue to cry. I can't really seem to stop. Josh moves off me and pulls me into his chest. He lets me cry into his chest while he strokes my hair and whispers soothing things in my ear, occasionally kissing my forehead. After a while, I manage to form some words.*
Me: I-it's not y-you.
*He looks down at me confused.*
Josh whispers: What?
*I open my mouth but no words come out.*
******TRIGER WARNING! DO NOT READ IF YOU GET TRIGGERED EASILY******
I take a deep breath and start to tell him. I can't believe i'm doing it but I am cause I trust him with my whole life. Literally.
Me: My D-Dad was a um, I guess druggie. He was very abusive to me and my Mom. He would h-hit us and he r-raped my Mom many times. H-he would let men have s-sex with me so he could get money for drugs. I-I couldn't stop stop t-them, they we're to strong and I was to young to fight back. T-They would his me and hurt me if I didn't d-do as they said. My D-dad, he just let them! He encouraged them to fucking do it! It broke me, it fucking broke me! It scared the shit out of me and I can't come back from it! I never will!
*At this point I am drowning in my tears. Josh pulls me back into his chest and lets me cry. I think he shed a couple of tears cause I felt them on my face.*
Josh: I'm sorry, i'm so so fucking sorry!
*I hug him tighter cause I can't form any words right now.*
Josh: We don't ever have to do something if your not ready, ok?
*I nod against his chest and he pulls me closer. He lays down with me still on his chest and starts to play with my hair. We both quickly fall asleep. me being tried from crying and Josh not wanting to leave my side.*
