Broken By A Savage: Her Pain, His Healing

Chapter 21

I can't believe he just said that. Is this nigga crazy, I trusted him enough to tell him things I don't even talk to my fucking daddy about? Every time I'm happy this always happens to me. I finally get back my confidence and self-esteem only for someone to tear it back down. That has to stop I have to set an example for my child. I would be a lie if I told you I'm not hurt by what he said because I am. I guess that's what happens when you trust someone with your heart. I have two options I can sit here and mop over a nigga who doesn't give a damn about me or his unborn child or I can get my shit together and do what I need to do for my. I'm not going back to the old Amber who would sit here and cry over something as simple as a bomb ass nigga. I'm getting up off my ass and wiping these tears and doing what in need to do to first finish high school and get this scholarship I need to pay for my college education. I got up from my bed and walked into my bathroom and took a shower so I could get ready for my doctor's appointment. Once I was done with my shower I waked into my closet to find something to wear. I found a pair of tribal print tights and a grey sweater. I dried my body off and put on lotion and put on my cloths. I walked over to my vanity and put my hair into bun and put on a pair of grey pearls. I grabbed some socks and put them on along with my pink Ugg boots. I grabbed my keys and my phone. I made my way to my car and headed to the doctor's office. I plugged in my phone listening to Jasmine Sullivan's new album Reality Show the whole way their

I walked into the doctor's office and signed in. I walked over to the waiting area I took a seat and waited penitently for my name to be called. While sitting there I thought of all the probabilities of me not being pregnant. This would be a lesson learned or it could be the worst thing to happen to me. In the past five years I've gone through thing that most people don't experience until their in their late thirties. I have literally gone through a mid-life crisis. I learned that my best friend is my sister, that my mother doesn't give a damn about me or my wellbeing. I was just a game she was playing in order to get taken care of. I've gone from having a best friend to no friends. Blake and I have rebuild our friendship only for it to get torn down by my new relationship with Andre. That obviously isn't as strong as I thought. Now I'm pregnant and alone and I still haven't told my family. The nurse calling my name knocked me out of my thoughts. I stood up wiping the tears that had fallen during my little pity party. I walked back to the examination room I finally looked up at the nurse. It was Lisa of all people.

"Hey Amber what are you doing here." I know this fake as bitch didn't just give me an attitude.

"I'm fine thank you." I replied giving her the same attitude back yes I can be bitchy too.

"You here to check on that bastard baby you carrying. I don't get you how could you cheat on my son. He was the only one to show your little fat ass some attention but no you had to be a little whore just like your mother." Fuck this being nice shit this bitch about to get her ass handed to her. No better yet let me fuck with this bitch check then we will see if she talking shit. I may be a bitch but I'm a classy bitch sometimes this is not one of those times.

"Excuse me Lisa don't get your ass handed to you. Yes I am fat but bitch I was fat when your son approached me and last time I checked your ass was no wear to found when me an Andre were fucking so stay in your fucking place. If my mother is ho then what the fuck are you. So miss me with this bullshit you don't think he didn't tell me how you were too busy on your knees to give a damn about him." I awaited a response.

"Exactly, so do your fucking job and hope I'm nice enough not to get your ass fired." Just like that she shut her mouth and finished her job I hate when people take my kindness for weakness. No class having ass bitch, fuck with me if you want too. After she left I waited about five minutes before the doctor came in.

"Ms. Amber am I right."

"Yes, just call me Amber."

"Well what brings you in today?"

"Well I took a home pregnancy test and I just need to know if I'm really pregnant."

"How many did you take?"

"Three"

"And they all came back positive and you still in denial" he looked at me with a questioning look.

"Yes I just need to know before I tell my family." I spoke holding my head down trying to fight of the tears that threatened to fall.

"Don't freak out I'm pretty sure you family and you and the father of this child will understand plus your blood pressure is a little too high for my liking already."

"Well you have your nurse to blame for that."

"Which one?"

"Lisa"

"Don't worry about that consider it handle and you're not the first patient I've had to complain about her. Could you lay back for me and lift up your shirt don't freak out I'm just going to do an ultrasound ok" I did what he asked. He squeezed a cold gel on my stomach and proceeded to explain to me what I was seeing on screen.

"Ok her this little dot on screen is the fetus. Your only four weeks along so I'm going to need you to try to keep you blood pressure down and avoid stress." I tuned him out and looked at the screen sinking the fact that I' going to be a mom. Me of all people I've been told and that nothing or no one would be able to love me. That's going to change I'm going to finish school do what I have to for my child everybody else can either be their or leave me alone.

"Well your done here and I see it's your birth day today so happy birthday."

"Wait what's today"

"It's the 18th of January"

"OH shit I forgot my own birthday." He laughed and told me to anther appointment for a few weeks so he could check on my blood pressure. I left the office and got to the car and called Jessica.

*Jessica's*

I've called Amber like three times and she's not answering I guess Andre is giving her an early birthday gift I just hope she using protection. I walked down stairs to see my momma and daddy making out in the kitchen.

"Ummm could yall stop doing all that around all this good food? I'm hungry and I don't want no body fluids flowing around my food." I spoke as I made my plate they both pulled away looking at me with a stank face.

"How would you know if body fluids weren't flowing while it was cooking" I instantly spit out my chicken tender that I had started to eat.

"Robert stop, you so damn nasty baby eat your food your daddy was just playing."

"No, I'm not even hungry anymore I'm going out for lunch yall nasty. Just nasty." I got up from my seat and threw away the food. I walked back upstairs to my room to see my phone ringing.

"Hello"

"Hey you called me earlier." she sounded like she had been crying I instantly got concerned.

"Yeah I wanted to tell you happy birthday, but you weren't answering I figured you were busy with your hubby Andre. Amber are you okay you don't sound like yourself"

"I'm fine thanks could you set up dinner with everybody."

"Ok I will so what you doing today for your birthday."

"Nothing really I'm just going to go have the day to myself and chill out."

"Okay alright I will talk to you later." damn that kind hurt my feelings we always spend our birthdays together. I guess that was her way of blowing me off for Andre. It's whatever I'm about to go get me some food in my stomach before I fall out. I walked inside of the mall making my way to the food court so I could get me some Panda Express. I made it their finally why do malls have to be so damn crowded and big damn. I stood in line observing the menu when I turned to see Andre and some thot. This nigga I turned back around and ordered my food not bothering to see what was going on. That's not my problem not putting myself in their relationship because I hate it when Amber did it to me. I don't care what yall think or how yall feel.