Destination Life or Death

18.5

I saw Glenn and Maggie talking outside. I wanted to talk to someone. I walked out and sat down next to Glenn on the porch. "Hey." I said smiling before Maggie sat down next to me. "Hey kid," Glenn said. They looked like they had been talking about something important. "Should I come back?" I asked, looking between the two. Maggie shook her head and stood up "Actually I have to go, I'm sorry." she said looking at me and nodding to Glenn, "I'll see you there." she said before walking away. I looked at him, "Where are you going?" I asked, before looking out at the people who were walking around. "Oh, no where" he said shrugging. They always did this, they would never tell me what was going on, I had to hear from Carl who heard bits and pieces from his dad. "Whats up? You okay?" he asked looking at me with an eyebrow raised. "If I tell you this, you have to promise not to tell Rick," I said, looking at him and widening my eyes. "Okay?" he looked at me confused. "Well I found out Carl has been going over the wall with Enid." I paused looking at him. "I decided to follow them the other day and I don't know," I shrugged before looking at the ground, "he told me that it was nothing between him and Enid, but there is definitely something there. And, he lied to me about it. He would always just say 'I'll be right back' or 'I'm gonna go see Ron'. I always knew it was a lie but....." Glenn cut me off "But he still lied." he said, nodding as he looked at me. "Exactly." I said, shaking my head. "I noticed you moved out of your room, I was wondering what happened." he paused, "Honestly Dez, he's a teenage boy. He won't tell you how he feels and if he feels like you don't feel the same as him, he will just ignore it." he said shaking his head, "That boy follows you around like a puppy, and you are wrapped around his little finger. Just tell him. Talk to him." he said smiling before standing up. "Thank you." I said smiling. "No problem Kiddo." he said rubbing his hand on top of my head. "I have to get going, but just trust me. Love ya kid" he said smiling and nodding before walking away. I trusted Glenn, more than most people here. I was happy he talked to me about it, I was happy I got the insight of a male, and not Michonne who would probably just look at me like I'm crazy. She was easy to talk to, but not about boys, especially when it has to do with Carl drama.

It had been a few weeks and Carl and I had been distant with each other. Things at Alexandria were not as smooth as we had hoped. I wanted to talk to him. I needed to talk to him, even through all of this, he was still my rock. I walked out towards the wall, it was dark so I couldn't see too well but once I got closer I saw two figures standing on a lifted wooden floor. I stopped and squinted my eyes before noticing the puffy hair that only Carl had. I looked down to see his hand under Enids, I knew it was her, it wouldn't have been anyone else. I looked over to the tree lining to see Ron staring at them angrily. He loved Enid, but maybe too dangerously. I turned around when I felt my cheeks getting hot. I wasn't going to cry over a boy in this day and age, especially if that boy was Carl Grimes. Once I got up to the porch, I sat down on the top step and sighed before looking up to the sky and looking at the stars. "Dezzy?'' I heard Carl voice say smoothly before sitting down next to me. "Hey.'' I said looking at him and smiling. As angry, but as sad as I was, I wanted him to be happy, and I wouldn't let him see that what he was doing affected me the way it did. "Are you okay?" he said nudging my shoulder. I nodded and shrugged, "Sometimes I just wish I was in highschool, dealing with prom drama." I paused and felt the quiver at my chin before I started lightly crying. "But instead, I'm living in a dead world, falling in love with someone I never should've met." I straightened my back and shook my head realizing what I had just said. "I'm sorry." I said standing up. I felt his hand try to grab mine to stop me but I slipped away and ran upstairs, locking the door behind me and crawling under the blankets.