Different

58.

Once Jace is seated comfortably, I see him eying me up and down briefly. I seat myself on his lap, with my knees next to each thigh of his.  "Oh yeah? And what's that?" he asks, daringly.  His pupils are narrow and for the first time, I feel his heart starting to beat just as fast as mine.

"What I wanted to do all day" I say as my cheeks heat up from the courage it took me to say that sentence to him. Jace sighs slightly, as I crash my lips onto his and lay my arms around his neck. He's clearly turned on from me making the first step for a change. It doesn't take long for me grind my hips on his crotch, as I feel the wine getting to my head. Not that I wouldn't do this if I was sober, but it does give me more courage.

After everything he did for me today this is all I want to do, be as close to him as possible. I want to give him something back, beside the dinner I made him tonight. Jace lifts the corners of my sweater, indicating that he wants it off. I quickly raise my arms and feel the slightly cold air hit me, as it falls down on the floor beside me. I'm a little nervous to do what I was planning tonight, but I really want to. I want to give him the same pleasure he always gives me, show him that I feel the same way about him just in case he doesn't already know. 

Once again it takes me a lot of courage, but I remove myself from his lap and place myself in between his legs with my knees on the floor. I catch a quick glimpse of Jace's eyes before doing so, and I can tell that he's excited for what's about to happen. He lets out a low growl when I open his belt. Not daring to look at him, I'm glad that he helps me to pull down his pants, remaining only in his tight briefs.

Now, I've done this before but I can't say that I used to enjoy it. It always made me feel like I'm just there for the man's pleasure, like an object.  With Jace, my feeling is different. I remember him telling me that he can't wait to feel this. So I know I want him to. My little train of thought must've distracted me slightly. I'm brought back into reality when I feel Jace's fingertips on my chin, pulling my face to meet his eyes.

"Hey. No pressure to do this. I hope you know that" he says, with a concerned stare in his face. He misinterpreted my silence wrong, I must have given him the feeling like I was unsure about doing this.

"I don't feel pressured" I whisper, letting my eyes meet his to show him how sincere I'm being. I can tell that he checks for the truth in my eyes and when he finds it, he quickly nods his head at me and pulls my face towards his to plant a kiss on my lips.  Now I definitely want to do it.

It doesn't take long for Jace's briefs to be pulled down his legs. Before I get started, I stroke him with my hand a few times. Then I take all of my courage together and wrap my lips around him. Jace hisses out of pleasure right away. It takes me a moment to remember what to do, but soon I find my rhythm. It's as if Jace can't control himself, he scoots closer towards me, sitting on the edge of the bed. Wondering what he's thinking, I dare to look up to him. 

"Oh fuck" he whispers when I do so, as he meets my eyes with his own. I continue for a little while, but my slight embarassment takes over and I look down again. I have no idea if I'm doing this right, but Jace's reaction tells me that I am.  "Come here" he whispers once his squirming under my touch gets more intense.