Mila Wilson is quiet, anxious and a little bit of a mess. Panic attacks have ruled her life for as long as she can remember - but starting college is her chance to take control. Love? Not something she believes she's built for.
Then she meets Jace E...
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The door clicks shut behind me, and with it, I finally exhale. My back slumps against the wood as I press into it, trying to catch my breath from the half-run I just did across campus. I feel like I've outrun a storm, but the thunder is still cracking inside me.
"Mila?" Bree's voice floats across the room, warm and concerned. "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."
I glance over. She's curled up on her bed, laptop open on her thighs, her face already tightening with worry.
"I think I might have," I say, trying for a smile but failing somewhere halfway. I let out one heavy sigh.
"What happened?" She sits up straighter, closing her laptop and patting the space beside her.
I cross the room, still piecing the moment together, and sit down. My jacket's too warm, but I don't take it off just yet. "I was walking back from the café. Picked up a sandwich. And then, just around the corner from here..." I pause. My brain is trying to catch up with what my eyes already saw. "I saw Jace. With some guy. And it was weird—no one else around, which felt off. It's not even that late."
Bree blinks. "You're not making any sense, girl."
"I know," I mutter, rubbing my forehead. "It's just... I think I saw Jace selling drugs to some guy. Like—actually dealing. Little plastic bag, handshake, the whole cliché."
She goes silent. I don't have to look up to know her mouth is open.
"Are you sure?" she finally asks, her voice low, careful.
"Pretty sure," I say, finally tugging off my jacket. "Unless he just has a weird way of gifting mints to strangers."
"Wow." She's quiet for a beat. "I mean... I don't want to sound like a bitch, but... I'm not that surprised."
I glance at her. "Yeah?"
She shrugs slightly, hand still on my back. "The tattoos, the attitude, the mystery. He's been walking around with the bad boy starter pack. It just kinda... fits."
"You're right." I sigh. "I just didn't expect it. I didn't even let the thought cross my mind. And now here I am, realizing I've been falling for someone I don't even know."
"Is it a deal-breaker?" she asks softly.
I look at the floor. "I think it might be. I've never been around that stuff. Never tried it, never wanted to. I already struggle to stay grounded most days. I need control, not... chaos. This just feels like a lot. Like I stepped into something I didn't sign up for."
Bree wraps her arms around me without saying a word. Her warmth is reassuring, and I lean into it.
"I think I need a shower," I mumble into her shoulder, before giving her a small, grateful smile. "Thanks for listening."
The shower burns my skin in the best way. I stand under the stream, letting the hot water rinse away the discomfort, the confusion, the gut-twisting nausea that came the moment I saw Jace's hands pass that tiny plastic bag. My thoughts spiral as the steam thickens. I don't know why this hurts as much as it does. Maybe because I was starting to see something good in him. Maybe because he let me. I don't even know what I feel—betrayed? Fooled? Just sick?
