Broken | ✓

CHAPTER TWENTY NINE: THE PARTS WE HIDE

                                 Jide

I took a deep breath and opened the door, I found Sandra staring at the window when I closed the door the sound caused her to turn to me.

She glimpsed at me briefly before rolling her eyes and turning back to the window.

Guilt pangs were digging their nails in my stomach.

"Sandra" I called.

She ignored.

"Sandra"

"Why are you here Jide?" She asked.

"Sandra please.."

"I said why are you here?" she interrupted me.

"The gate man told me you were rushed to the hospital. What happened?" I walked towards her.

"You happened" she replied.

"Sandra, I'm so sorry" I apologized.

"Move away from me" she ordered.

I was the reason why she bled, why she was strapped to that bed but I had to make a decision. I had to choose Ireti. She was the only person who made me think of a future. Before I was living everyday waiting for the hour of death but she gave me the desire to live. Even though I did choose Ireti, it was never my intention to hurt Sandra. I loved her so much.

"Sandra, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault"

I should have halted the rollercoaster that was us a long time seeing that I never imagined a future with her as my partner but I was selfish. Sandra held my head above the water, she was the reason I didn't drown. I needed her. My selfishness almost caused her the life of her baby.

"No, it is my fault. Why did I think I had a shot at being with you? You had made it clear several times that you didn't want to be with me. I guess it was easier to keep pursuing you then because you didn't want to be with anyone and now all of a sudden you want to be with somebody and it's not me" tears gathered at the foot of her eye lids.

I never thought I would want to be with anybody but maybe that is one of the reasons they say love is crazy. It makes you do and feel things you would not in a million years do and feel.

"I risked my baby's life today because of this stupid love I have for you but this is the height of it. I can't do this anymore" she paused and exhaled. A shiver ran down my spine.

"I don't want to be your friend anymore. It's exhausting being your friend when I want more. I can't be your friend anymore Jids" she allowed the tears flow down her cheeks. It wasn't the usual I don't want to be your friend she said on impulse whenever we had a heated argument. This time her eyes meant every word she said. My friendship with Sandra had reached the finish line.

It broke my heart to see her cry especially as I was the reason. If only I was just a little bit brave, a little bit courageous she would still be my friend but she was right she couldn't be my friend anymore because I would always keep choosing Ireti.

"I understand" my voice cracked a bit.

"Can I hug you just one last time?" I requested.

"Yes" she squeaked.

I wrapped my hands around her tightly.

They say that all your favorite memories flash across your eyes only when you are staring death in the face but that's not the complete truth. Your favorite memories also flash across your eyes when you are detaching from somebody that meant a lot to you.